JT -- I am sorry you have suffered because of her words. The fact is, she was with you, even during the time she was with someone else. Words are words, actions are actions.
The words ring in our ears, of course. And they hurt.
But, I'm sure she told you other things as various points, like that she loved you. If you truly step back, words are used as both weapons and defenses. My ex-girlfriend's words contradicted actions, and even contradicted themselves, at many points. When she felt cornered, or condemned, or defenseless, the stuff she said could have scalded me. And it did at the time.
How do we release ourselves from the torture of the words? First, we have to allow ourselves to grieve what we felt we lost. It is a loss -- even if we feel victimized, or traumatized. Second, we have to figure out how to re-frame what happened. We have to figure out how we relate to it. Often times, we are not going to get the closure or clarity from the other person. It's only going to come from within.
Keep posting and putting one foot in front of the other. I've used this list alot
Surviving a Breakup with Someone Suffering with Borderline Personality Disorder - 10 Beliefs That Can Get You Stuck
