A false happiness

[buterfly]

Just as my BPD husband told me when we first separated... .He is telling everyone (especially people I know) about his new found happiness and life... .It's been 3 1/2 months since I left. He says (to our realtor, my friend) he's moving in with a "friend" which based on his phone records, and his past hatred towards his friends I determine to think is another woman. Our divorce is not even final, yet... .

It's strange to me as I have found knowledge in each emotion of the grieving process... .Have been reflecting on myself, etc. but I know I'm painted black, now.

Yet, when it comes to dealing with myself and my legal counsel, he wants to take everything, as if he's still attempting to control my soul... .



I'm not sure if I asking for advice, as much as looking for anyone who can relate or even listen.

[enlighten me]

My ex wife was the same. All the lines she fed me of "I wont do this" and "I wont do that " where just lies. When it came down to it she went for the throat and didn't stop until she got all she could out of me.

She was also oh so happy with her new boyfriend. Funny thing is they married on july 5th and on July 8th she contacted me moaning about him and wanting to talk.

They are always happy but it never lasts. We are the lucky ones. We can recover where as they are doomed to repeat the same cycle. But even the cycle will falter as their looks fade and they don't have as much to offer until one day they are having to settle and put up with someone that they would never have wanted to be with.

[Deeno02]

Im divorced from my wife of 18 years for about 3 years now. The pain i went through doesnt even compare to the break up of my BPDgf of a year and a half and me a month ago. I can barely tolerate it. The calliusness they show is mind numbing and i cant wrap my hands around their dumped me on a Monday,  new guy on a Tuesday mentality. Its the worst feeling in the world not to have mattered to that person.

[myself]

Was our happiness not as true because they weren't honest with us?

[MrConfusedWithItAll]

They are expert at the mind games.  The good news is that you are now free from the  crazy - and you can pay your lawyer to deal with divorce related matters.  Congratulations on breaking free.  In truth you have to feel sorry for his friend - stay NC or LC and prepare for a recycle or triangulation when things begin to sour with his new supply.