A Big THANK YOU

[clljhns]

Driving home today I was struck by thought of the things that I should be thankful for. Not the typical things: my daughter, my friends, my health, etc. But to those people who forced me to grow in ways that I never would have known possible. So here is my thank you.

To those who made fun of someone's affliction, disability, or race,

THANK YOU!

You caused me to stop and question your beliefs, and in turn, to strengthen my resolve to see the beauty inside everyone, and to be a champion of equality.

To those who criticized, demeaned, ridiculed, or degraded me.

THANK YOU!

You forced me to go within and do the necessary work to learn to trust myself and see the beauty inside that is uniquely me.

To those who lied, cheated, deceived, and have stolen from me.

THANK YOU!

You helped me to set my moral compass in the opposite direction and I learned the value of truth.

To those who told me I was stupid for my thoughts and that I couldn't do what I aspired to do.

THANK YOU!

Without your challenging my dreams, I would never have shattered my own boundaries and reached beyond the limitations that I had placed upon myself.

To those who told me to fear an unseen, dark force, lurking in the shadows waiting to take my soul and force me into evil acts.

THANK YOU!

If you had never told me this, I would not have wondered about this entity and gone on a quest to understand. Leading me to new pathways of faith and understanding.

And finally, to those of you who wounded my soul.

THANK YOU!

I would not have fought so hard to reclaim myself and worked so hard at loving who I am.


While I am truly thankful for the champions in my life, I am still thankful for the lessons brought to me through those who hurt me the most.

Does this resonate with anyone? Can you find the things that you are thankful for through unkind actions?

Peace and blessings.

[Kwamina]

Hi clljhns

Thanks for your shout-outs to all the haters out there

I realized a few months ago that all the things I had to learn to deal with my BPD relatives (boundaries, communication techniques, assertiveness etc.) were also very valuable tools in other aspects of my life. I already knew this on a rational level but all of a sudden it really clicked for me when I was faced with a difficult person in my professional life. I applied what I learned to deal with my BPD relatives on this person too and it really helped me a lot. In fact I've also come to realize that many of the skills we learn to deal with BPD relatives are highly advanced life skills that most 'regular' people have not really developed that much at all.

[pessim-optimist]

Does this resonate with anyone? Can you find the things that you are thankful for through unkind actions?

Yes, thank you for asking that question... .

Though it would be strange to rejoice in the things that brought us pain or destruction, we can certainly rejoice in the LESSONS, WISDOM and EXPERIENCE that they brought us.

And I think that is the way that not only transforms us from victims into thriving individuals, it is the best way of giving those experiences a positive purpose in our life. To understand that they can become an asset rather than a hated handicap (victimizing us forever).

I am in particular reminded of one verse from the Bible that I used to have a problem with when I was younger:

"all things work together for good to them that love God"

I used to be upset at the notion that somehow bad things would be called good. Now I understand that that's not the case. Rather that all things good and bad can transform us in positive ways.

And then, "we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted" (another verse).

Here are a couple of things I am thankful for:

Being left alone to my own devices caused me to dig deep and become resilient, resourceful and independent.

Having been unsupported and hurt at home caused me to look around and find loving and supportive people and to learn the difference.

Again, thank you for your question, I am looking forward to reading other responses!

In fact I've also come to realize that many of the skills we learn to deal with BPD relatives are highly advanced life skills that most 'regular' people have not really developed that much at all.

Perhaps they never had the need for them, correct? What an asset to have for a rainy day, though!

[clljhns]

Kwamina,

I realized a few months ago that all the things I had to learn to deal with my BPD relatives (boundaries, communication techniques, assertiveness etc.) were also very valuable tools in other aspects of my life.

Yes! Exactly what I was getting at!

pessim-optimist,

And I think that is the way that not only transforms us from victims into thriving individuals, it is the best way of giving those experiences a positive purpose in our life. To understand that they can become an asset rather than a hated handicap (victimizing us forever).

Absolutely! Isn't this a much better space to occupy? Thank you for sharing your "Thank you's".

Being left alone to my own devices caused me to dig deep and become resilient, resourceful and independent.

This resonated with me, as I was a very lonely child, which taught me resilience and independence.

Peace and blessings to us all! 

[clljhns]

HI ElvisLives,

I wish I could 'like' this post clljhns... .like on Facebook.

It's perfect.  Thank you

You are welcome!

Thanks for the link. I enjoyed the article and it is true that we hold onto these transgressions at a cellular level. That is why it is so important to cleanse the spirit from these past emotional bonds.

Peace and blessings.

[ElvisLives]

Right back atcha!

Cleanse and heal... .yes, I am doing that.  I wish it for us all.   

[clljhns]

 

[Shankz]