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Author Topic: Does she have remorse or empathy? and will she come back?  (Read 451 times)
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 158

« on: November 04, 2014, 09:18:11 AM »

Been over a month since the b/u. When she was packing up her things she told me the "it wasn't me it was her" line and that I was the best boyfriend and will be great one day. Over the last month she has reached out a handful of times. The first was a text message days after the initial b/u saying that I was the best bf and she was sorry for being crazy. I got an email 3 weeks later asking if I was okay, and just wanted to know if I was okay and thanking me for being in her life. A week later I got a fb message and she called me and left me two voice mails. She basically said she still loved me, wanted to know if I was ok, and still wanted me in her life.

I have been NC since day 1 and she hasn't tried to contact me since she called. We go to the same College, it is a technical college and REALLY small. WE both know each others schedules so she could have easily checked up on me if she was really wondering how I felt. And I am one of the only people on the planet who dealt with her craziness and loved her through it all, so I think that is why she still "wants me in her life". Also as a backup because she knows that she would rarely find a guy as good to her as I was.

Whenever she contacted me it was all about her, about how lonely and confused she was. It was all HER feelings and the only line about my feelings was "I know you're upset". She told me she would leave me alone if I just told her I was ok, to me this sounded like she was wanting me to tell her that just so she didn't feel so bad for the damage caused. (Selfish behavior?)

So my question is, is she showing real remorse/empathy or is it just to gain me back in her life for her own personal usage? She is saying one thing but has plenty of opportunities to "talk" to me or see "if I am ok".

My other question is will she come back? I was her first love/serious relationship. We dated for 2.5 years, when her longest relationship before me was probably 1 month. She lost her virginity to me and I gave her "unconditional" love (she even said that in her email). Once she breaks up with her bfs it is normally like she just brushes them off or doesn't want anything to do with them. But she never dated anyone as long as me and we got really close during our relationship. I guess part of me wants her to come back though I know it isn't good and will only hurt me.

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