Ever spend the weekend with 2 pwBPD?

[ColdEthyl]

I just had to share, no real complaints just thought it was funny. My husband is diagnosed BPD, his son shows traits. We spent the weekend with him and his wife, and there were a few things I just found hilarious.

The first one my husband and his son went to the store together to buy gifts for our grandchild. They were gone for a little bit, so I texted them to make sure they were ok. They didn't reply, but neither she (daughter in law) or I were surprised. They both do not answer texts, yet throw a cow if you take too long.

They got in about 15 minutes later and on the side my husband starts talking to me about how they were both in the pink isle of the toy isle for 30 minutes because his son couldn't decide what present to buy, and another 20 minutes looking at girl's clothes. He wasn't complaining so much, but just remarking on how kinda crazy that was, which I really find hilarious. They were both a bit edgy when they got back, so I'm sure the trip to the store wasn't that pleasant. My daughter and law and I talk a bit when we have a chance, and both of them are known to go sit in the car in the middle of a shopping trip due to anxiety issues.

I'm glad I wasn't there, but I would have loved to be a fly on the wall seeing those two guys trying to make heads or tails of girl toys and clothes poor things <3

After supper, we were all just sitting at the table chatting, and my husband starts doing his usual I'm-Anxious-So-I-Will-Talk-A-Lot thing, and I see them exchanging glances. We were talking about weather and meteors, and we kept asking what time they were supposed to be seen, and he kept going on and on about types of meteors, what time of year you can see this and that... .after 4 attempts to get the time our of him, he finally said he would have to look it up rofl

I've told her before that he will do that... .he will get anxious and talk a lot, sounding like a know it all, cuts people off, changes subjects... .

She said it was ok usually her husband is the one that does it, she said at least the material was different ROFL

You know, I'm sorry her husband is uBPD, but at the same time it's nice to talk to someone face-to-face about this and know I'm not crazy rofl

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[maxsterling]

My wife and my sister in law are both diagnosed BPD.  My brother in law is classic NPD, undiagnosed.   And my very own mother has her share of BPD traits, though not like she did when she was younger. 

My sister in law does not get along with my brother in law - no surprise because nobody gets along with him too well.  My sister in law tends to want to get close to my wife, but my wife rejects her, and also rejects my mother.  I think she rejects both because they exhibit BPD qualities that hit too close to home.  She claims my mom "lacks and identity" and talks too much about other people.  She says the same about my sister in law.

As you can imagine, family functions are a fun time

[breathelater]

My upbdh and his dBPD brother are a sight to behold when they are together.  It's as though they are soul mates and only they can understand each other's language.   

We've had many relationship problems tied to his brother's influence and many times my husband would say to me " I don't know about that... .I need to ask my brother what he thinks".  I would say "yea, it's like having one clown ask the other... .is my nose too big?".

[ColdEthyl]

My wife and my sister in law are both diagnosed BPD.  My brother in law is classic NPD, undiagnosed.   And my very own mother has her share of BPD traits, though not like she did when she was younger. 

My sister in law does not get along with my brother in law - no surprise because nobody gets along with him too well.  My sister in law tends to want to get close to my wife, but my wife rejects her, and also rejects my mother.  I think she rejects both because they exhibit BPD qualities that hit too close to home.  She claims my mom "lacks and identity" and talks too much about other people.  She says the same about my sister in law.

As you can imagine, family functions are a fun time

It's pretty funny to watch my husband complain about the things his son does, and it's like he has NO CLUE he does the exact same thing. The odd thing is my son-in-law was not raised anywhere near my husband. He got a girl pregnant when he was young and they were both homeless living in abandoned buildings. He was going to marry her to raise the child, but she didn't have any interest in being a mother. She left the child with him and he had him for five months before her mother asked to see him for a weekend. After she picked him up, her and her gf (the grandmother) ran off to another state with him. This was all before the Internet and everything, so he wasn't very successful finding him.

I would only believe parts of this is my husband's mom didn't confirm the core parts of it. She was there helping him with the baby.

Well after 20+ years, his son returned to our state and looked him up last year. We have been building a relationship and visiting with them which I felt was great, and it might be helpful to both of them.

Even though he wasn't raised or around his dad, he is definitely BPD. They say the similar things, like similar things, have similar behaviors... .the similarities are bizarre. His wife and I talk about it and always end up laughing at how much they are the same.

It really has gotten me wondering how much of people's personalities is genetic and how much is from how you were raised. I have always thought it was a combination of nature and nurture with nurture being more important, but I am questioning that ratio.

[Cat Familiar]

Yep, I really think the "nature" part is a huge component. Very interesting!