A little worried

[BPDGuy1]

So, I've been hovering around the board for around two weeks now ( you guys/girls have really helped a lot ). After reading so many posts trying to get my head round what on earth went wrong in my 6 month relationship I am pretty sure my Ex Girlfriend has BPD.

You know the drill and how things panned out.

Super hot

Came on like a whirlwind

Love you's are 2 months

needy

Soulmates

Knew exactly what i was looking for

Asked me to prove how much I loved her constantly

Talked about every ex being abusive

Still in contact with the last ( or more ) said he would'nt leave her alone ( i said change her number, which she did only somehow he got her new number within 2 days.

Gas lighting constantly

Says her ex stalked her ( got him arrested, threatening rape apparently )

Silent treatment

distancing

Ended the relationship

Wanted to be friends

So after the demise of this. I advised I could not be friends with an ex. Just wouldn't work. I decided to start moving on with things ( even though it hurt like hell ). Around a month ago I get a hate filled message accusing me of abandoning her because I did want to be friends WTH? Then a few days later a message after she saw some pictures of me out with a friend on FB for new years who she didn't like. Literally called me every name under the sun and told me if I wanted to talk about her behind her back, say it to her face. I have never said a word about her. Defended myself, explained that i'd had not said anything about her and asked her to tell me who had said that and she switched subjects to "I would have never fit in anyway". I ignored it and went  NC. 3 days later she is blowing up FB with her replacement ( friend of mine from school ). Does this sound like BPD? and why on earth is she so angry after she ended things?

Anyway, i've not heard from her in a week or so but I'm sure I've seen her driving around close to where I live ( no reason to be anywhere near me as i live in a different town 25 mins away from her ). I've just checked my FB and I have a message from a girl who is not on my friends list, has no friends etc asking me how i'm doing... .Never had one before, could this be her? Also, whats the deal with not sending my things back? I've sent her things back, with a note asked to post mine back. No response!

I am worried as her new replacement is known for being a utter psycho and I can only imagine what she is saying to him about me. I guess the same things she was saying about her ex to me. I have a feeling a baiting text is coming, so if I respond I will be the one who's stalking and rile her new partner up. Does that make sense? Any advice on how to protect myself would be great.

Thank you

[cehlers55]

Wow. Great description.

My story is about 99% the same as yours.

Really good looking.

Only friends with dudes.

All ex boyfriends stalked her.

Total black and white thinking all the time.

All you can do is go no contact.

Dont call

don't respond.

My guess is she'll use anything at this point to get you arrested so do not fall for the tricks.

She will stop texting you eventually.

That's funny, my ex wife wouldn't send me anything back either. Had to get the attorney to write a letter to get my garage opener back.

[BPDGuy1]

It's crazy how many stories are so similar. It's almost like we are talking about the same person! My take on the stuff thing is it's a avenue to make contact later?

The funny thing is replacement thing and throwing it in my face has actually made things easier to deal with and move on.

[cehlers55]

Yeah the more I read on these boards the more i'm amazed how similar some stories are. It might be something to make contact about later. Maybe not. My guess is it makes her feel better knowing she's got some stuff you want and you'll never get it. So unless it's something you would file a police report about, i'd let go.

I sort of revel in the fact that my attorney sent her a letter to get a garage door opener. But not really. The letter probably cost me $250 to get a $100 garage opener back.

Mine doesn't have a replacement yet (that I know of). She's bouncing from rescuer to rescuer among our mutual friends right now.

Previously i was REALLY REALLY drinking the kool-aide. The gaslighting, isolation, stubborn illogical arguments really took their toll. Hang in. I think in another couple months I'll be back to my old self.

[BPDGuy1]

Yeah It's nothing I can't live without. I really don't want to antagonize things any further. My other ex ( also BPD and also mother to my two boys, yes I know how to pick them ) I tried to be more forceful with and it just made things worse. So I'm just going to let it go. This new one is off the scale compared to her though.

I'm starting therapy soon. Really just to understand how I keep finding myself attracted to these kind of personalities as I can't go through this again.

It's like I'm at a bar see a girl and think "hey you look like a bad decision, come over here" haha!

Hang in there buddy, times a great healer. After a month LC to NC I already feel better. You can PM me anytime you need a chat. 

[Tim300]

I would go NC unless you have bars of gold over at her place. 

It is crazy how we all have such similar stories.  Mine talked a lot about how she had been stalked several times.  I could see how someone could feel "stalked" by an ex once, or maybe twice, but if this is a pattern, clearly something is wrong with the person allegedly being stalked.  For example, (1) she makes it up in her head; (2) she says "I love you" and then disappears; or (3) she does such awful things to people that she fears they're out to seek revenge on her.

[BPDGuy1]

I think it's probably leading ex's on, then letting them down and playing them off against her current boyfriend ( me last time ). Just for the drama.

This board has been a godsend. It mentally prepared me for what was to come. I.e wanted to be friends, while lining up a replacement. All happened exactly as other members previous experiences. I was prepared, and when it did happen. I'd already morned for it and it was easier to deal with.

It's honestly made my resolve stronger in NC, not weaker if that makes sense? 

[Tim300]

It's honestly made my resolve stronger in NC, not weaker if that makes sense? 

Makes sense.  I cannot even begin to imagine going through a BPD relationship and the discard without having the Internet forums, articles, etc., on BPD, to explain what happened.