Crying in my office

[VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?"]

This past week has been trying.  My ex returned to town to continue the divorce process.  She love bombed, begged for reconciliation, nearly drove me mad, but eventually moved forward with filing the next round of paperwork.

Somehow throughout, I maintained my composure.

This morning though, as all the difficulty of this trip is behind me and they head for the airport, an email from my stb former mother-in-law just triggered the water works. 

It was a thank you note.  Thanking me for all I did for her daughter over the years.  It was all things she's said to me before, but as I read through tears just began to flow.  I'm not sure if it was the finality of it, some underlying feeling of loss, or just a sense of relief that I made it through the last week, but something about it struck a cord.

Hoping I can pull myself together for the work day, but it may be a lost cause.

[ADecadeLost]

This past week has been trying.  My ex returned to town to continue the divorce process.  She love bombed, begged for reconciliation, nearly drove me mad, but eventually moved forward with filing the next round of paperwork.

Somehow throughout, I maintained my composure.

This morning though, as all the difficulty of this trip is behind me and they head for the airport, an email from my stb former mother-in-law just triggered the water works. 

It was a thank you note.  Thanking me for all I did for her daughter over the years.  It was all things she's said to me before, but as I read through tears just began to flow.  I'm not sure if it was the finality of it, some underlying feeling of loss, or just a sense of relief that I made it through the last week, but something about it struck a cord.

Hoping I can pull myself together for the work day, but it may be a lost cause.

[jhkbuzz]

This past week has been trying.  My ex returned to town to continue the divorce process.  She love bombed, begged for reconciliation, nearly drove me mad, but eventually moved forward with filing the next round of paperwork.

Somehow throughout, I maintained my composure.

This morning though, as all the difficulty of this trip is behind me and they head for the airport, an email from my stb former mother-in-law just triggered the water works. 

It was a thank you note.  Thanking me for all I did for her daughter over the years.  It was all things she's said to me before, but as I read through tears just began to flow.  I'm not sure if it was the finality of it, some underlying feeling of loss, or just a sense of relief that I made it through the last week, but something about it struck a cord.

Hoping I can pull myself together for the work day, but it may be a lost cause.

Staying composed is an AWESOME accomplishment 

That note from your mother in law was probably really validating - bless her heart for writing it.

Can you take the day off?  I sure would if I were you. We call them "mental health days" where I live!

[Turkish]

Hi ADL,

I can understand it being both validating and sad to get a note like that. My ex-MIL had/has a lot of sympathy for me as well. She even begged her D to "work it out!" between us, but my Ex lied by omission to her mother (and a lot of others) on how attached she was to her then affair partner, now fiancee.

For months, I cried every day, in the office, in the car, at home, trying to not show it in front of the kids at times. It's a sign of deep pain, and you have a right to feel the way you do. Let if flow. I can't say when it will stop, but it will eventually.

[DyingLove]

This past week has been trying.  My ex returned to town to continue the divorce process.  She love bombed, begged for reconciliation, nearly drove me mad, but eventually moved forward with filing the next round of paperwork.

Somehow throughout, I maintained my composure.

This morning though, as all the difficulty of this trip is behind me and they head for the airport, an email from my stb former mother-in-law just triggered the water works. 

It was a thank you note.  Thanking me for all I did for her daughter over the years.  It was all things she's said to me before, but as I read through tears just began to flow.  I'm not sure if it was the finality of it, some underlying feeling of loss, or just a sense of relief that I made it through the last week, but something about it struck a cord.

Hoping I can pull myself together for the work day, but it may be a lost cause.

I'm crying reading this.  So touching... .I'm fresh and loaded with pain and emotion.  I wish you the best about this.

My ex's father is the NICEST guy ever.  He messaged me on FB and said: When I get my business going, to let him know so that he could pass the word on.  Would this be considered some kind of valiidation?  The rest of her family just about suck... .expecially the brother and mother.

[ADecadeLost]

Thank you all.  I managed to pull myself together after a bit, but it still made for a long morning.  Had a good laugh at noon though, when I went home to the house for the first time since last Wednesday (had been in a hotel while they stayed there). 

This trip was supposed to give her a chance to collect a few more of her belongings.  There had been a specific list of things she wanted to grab this time (other things would stay until she decides if she will be staying with family out of the country or looking for work in the states). 

When I looked around the living room though, I noticed one of the specific items, her camera, was still there.  Curious, I glanced around and couldn't really find anything missing.  Strange, but she had been an emotional mess (trying to convince me to not move forward with the divorce she filed for), so it's possible she just hadn't had the will in her to pack.  I understood that on some level, and just let it go.

Then I walked into the kitchen and noticed a large gap on the counter.  The Kuerig coffeemaker my mother had given her for Christmas two years ago was missing.  I just shook my head and laughed out loud.  Of all the items to worry about, she took home the coffee maker that neither one of us likes.  Some things I'll just never understand.

[Loosestrife]

Hey, well done for making it through the day and managing to see some lightness in the situation. I used to get really upset at work during long periods of splitting and had yo yo for regular walks/ coffees. Patsy strong. We are all rooting for you 

[ADecadeLost]

Thanks. 

Found the coffeemaker actually.  Tucked away on the top shelf of the pantry with some other random things that weren't there previously.  Now I'm thinking it's more a situation of her mother "cleaning."  Not the first time things have magically moved after her mother has been in the house.