reality

[BeingB]

I am exhausted.  She graduates high school soon.  Hoped for her to go away to college paid the deposit.  Realizing she will not be capable.  Trying to get her to want a life seems impossible.  I feel alone.  Her lies to everyone about me have caused so much heartache.  I am happy finally to have a diagnosis  for what her issues are.  But when does life ever calm down?  It seems to all make sense but what lies ahead for my daughter frightens me.  We can't find a med that works.  Roller coaster rides are exhausting.  I'm in constant cheerleader mode.  I'm told get counseling for me.  Most don't understand about this and there isn't always someone who can keep an eye on my daughter.  Who can be fine one minute.  Suicidal the next.  :)oes it ever balance.  Will life ever feel OK again.  I feel so overwhelmed at times.  I can't remember the last time there was a good day. 

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[lbjnltx]

Hello BeingB,

Welcome to the Parent's board. 

I'm sorry to learn about your daughter having BPD, how old is she now?

You mention being happy to find a diagnoses, is she in therapy and did this diagnoses come from her therapist?

All the concerns about her future are valid and common to us parents.

Medications have not been developed for the treatment of the disorder though some can help with the anxiety and depression that accompany BPD.

The emotional rollercoaster ride is so exhausting for us to witness and feel helpless to stop the ride! Thinking about how it  must feel for our kids just adds to our pain. 

Have you decided whether or not to get counseling for yourself?  Having the support for self (coming here and having a therapist) are good ways to practice self care.  We must take care of ourselves if we are going to be able to take care of our kiddos that are suffering.

lbj

[BeingB]

My daughter turns 18 this summer.  She's been in counseling since 8th grade.  Started with terrible bullying. The most recent therapist she saw for over a year.  The woman was not capable of helping her.  I didn't realize it until my husband and I met with her.  We have a,new therapist 3 sessions so far.  We have a new psychiatrist they work hand in hand.  Its,been tough we haven't found a med that works.  The depression is so severe at times.  We have tried in hospital. We have tried a day program all before diagnosis all before any real direction  my daughter has been the exception on everything.  Bad therapist at a residential place.  Crazier kids at a day program one wanted to kill my daughter because she cried.  The journey has been insane.  I am amazed there are others.  I am not alone.  I am trying to find a therapist for me.  Best quite was my daughters new therapist said either I am a great mother or the best actress.  Really.  Yes my child portrays me as a child hitter.  Tells everyone I hit her.  I never have.  It's a crazy routine tough life to live.   I worry about her.  Pray I can find the strength to be what she needs.  I worry when she's 18 that trouble can come.  Meaning she could just exit from our lives.  I pray she goes to college.  I pray the latuda. She started last night works.  She's on welbutrin and,Lamictal and clonopin for her anxiety.  She is not hurting herself she has been past this for about 3 months.  Her eating disorder is OK.  She is unhappy with her weight but her body image is poor.  She is a size 2 /4.  Relationships seem to be her issue.  She can't keep friends.  Looking back this was always the problem. I just didn't see it.  She finds fault with everyone and ends up without anyone. 

[mileenie]

I am sorry that this is so painful. My daughter is almost 16, and I too, pray that she will be able to go to college.

Have you been able to find a DBT program for her?