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How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
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Author Topic: Borderline ex and strange behavior  (Read 706 times)
Lostinwonderland70
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 53


« on: May 26, 2015, 07:19:36 PM »

Ok so today my borderline ex showed up at the preliminary hearing for the false harassment claim she has placed against me. My lawyer asked why she was there because he said plaintiffs never show up to those. It's just to see if you have a lawyer and set trial date. About 3 hours later I got a funny notification on Instagram of a name I didn't know liking a picture of a wine we both loved. She'd created a fake account and liked it. I know it is her based on seeing something she posted. What do you make of this?
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Circle
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 517


« Reply #1 on: May 26, 2015, 11:16:55 PM »

You might want to post on the Family Law board.

It sounds to me like she is playing games.

Maybe the game she is playing, involves trying to confuse you? Maybe she is having second thoughts about falsely accusing you, now that it's becoming more real? Perhaps she wants to back out? Perhaps you could send a veiled peace-offering to her "secret" instagram profile; like a meme/photo that says something along the lines of "can't we mend broken fences?"

I don't know.

Just ideas.

Sorry that this person is showering their confusion on you.

Good job showing up to your preliminary hearing!

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Lostinwonderland70
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 53


« Reply #2 on: May 27, 2015, 11:10:59 AM »

I don't know. Her showing up at court threw me as the plaintiff never comes to that date. But her making the fake account then liking an old picture on mine to let me know her other account is there I don't get. I've had people say it could be from her wanting to reach out to me, to her doing it to punish me more, to her trying to set me up to contact her, to her mind being distorted and it just being that. I don't know. But the confusion is great now.
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Circle
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 517


« Reply #3 on: May 28, 2015, 10:33:38 AM »

I guess when you get down to it, it doesn't matter what her motivations are. You just have to work with the situation that she started. And, finish it. One of my family members sat jury in a false accusation case, a few years ago. The jury felt quite sure that it was a false accusation, and the accused was judged innocent.

Of course, you'll want to steer clear of this person, right? Who knows what they will do next? Take care.
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Lostinwonderland70
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 53


« Reply #4 on: May 28, 2015, 10:38:50 AM »

She's still angry about something after a month. On the fake Instagram she's just posting very angry things now. My lawyer says with all that we have I'll get off. But I'm still worried about her
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Circle
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 517


« Reply #5 on: May 28, 2015, 08:28:57 PM »

Glad to hear your lawyer's vote of confidence. That's good news! I know, I'm worried about my exS.O., at this very moment. She makes me feel like I could puke. But, her problems are not my problems. It's part of being a co-dependent, I think, from what I've read. We just have this need to take care of everybody else. "Terminal Martyr Syndrome". It makes me sick inside. I've got to work at letting go and not carrying her burdens... .worrying-wise, or responsibility-wise.
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Lostinwonderland70
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 53


« Reply #6 on: May 31, 2015, 05:12:51 PM »

I really just don't have a clue at this point. I'm doing what I need to do to protect myself. But me and her Charm in the background. I wish I had some understanding of what she is doing.
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