No contact

[guess24]

Hello!  I have a few questions for the members on this board.  How long have you been no contact?  Did your exBPD partner try to contact you? 

[Pretty Woman]

Everytime after she dumped me I would try to get her back and it would end up with her threatening a RO or something like that.

This time she has a replacement she is dating.  She wanted to stay friends while telling me I am "the love of her life". Really?

So I am NC. I would say 39 days has been the longest but I think it is because her replacement fell through.

i can tell you want contact. I've been there. You need reassurance this is BPD and you are not crazy.

While every BPD'er is different I have noticed patterns in mine. Breakups at the same time of year... .certain triggers... .

Use this time wisely to take care of YOU. If this person is a "returner" they will return just as you are starting to feel better about yourself.

Take it from me though... .it gets worse each time you take them back and it tells them you are a doormat.

[harysc]

Obviously when you initiate no contact it's going to be the BPD that is going to make contact- When I choose no contact it's obviously at the point where I can't deal with her anymore or she is devaluing me.

Mine contacts me when things are not going well on her side, She'll throw in a lame excuse for reaching out and get to business once she is sure she has secured my sentiment, can be months or years of no contact- they just pop out of the blue.

A year at most I've been without contact.