Did I share too much?

[Our abuse recovery guide]

At work today my co-worker mentioned that she doesn't speak with her mom. She was sharing stories about what her mom has done and I started to share as well. I ended up telling her about my mom forcing me into therapy when I was a teenager and forcing me to take anti-depressants when it was really her that needed help. I also told her about my alcoholic uncle, drug addict brother and that my mom has BPD ad we have had no contact for 10 years. Now I feel embarrassed and feel like I may have shared too much. She was talking about her family in a similar way but mine was clearly quite a bit worse.

It felt normal to talk about it at the time but now it's 2:00am and I feel anxious and embarrassed... .I don't feel ashamed that I come from a family like this but I don't want people at work to think there's something wrong with me either.

Thanks for listening,

Lexicat

[lexicat]

At work today my co-worker mentioned that she doesn't speak with her mom. She was sharing stories about what her mom has done and I started to share as well. I ended up telling her about my mom forcing me into therapy when I was a teenager and forcing me to take anti-depressants when it was really her that needed help. I also told her about my alcoholic uncle, drug addict brother and that my mom has BPD ad we have had no contact for 10 years. Now I feel embarrassed and feel like I may have shared too much. She was talking about her family in a similar way but mine was clearly quite a bit worse.

It felt normal to talk about it at the time but now it's 2:00am and I feel anxious and embarrassed... .I don't feel ashamed that I come from a family like this but I don't want people at work to think there's something wrong with me either.

Thanks for listening,

Lexicat

[claudiaduffy]

If anything, you probably opened up a friendly door for your co-workers to be just as real as you were whenever they need to in the future!

There are no rules about how much is too much. As long as you're not monopolizing conversation, being open and real with people can be a beautifully disarming thing that gives everyone a chance to be validated in the long run.

[Panda39]

Now I feel embarrassed and feel like I may have shared too much. She was talking about her family in a similar way but mine was clearly quite a bit worse.

You know the fact that your story was worse might have made your friend feel better... .Things are bad but not that bad, Lexicat has it worse. 

I would not be embarrassed that you shared with your friend it might have been scary for them to talk about their situation and you being able to identify with their story was probably validating.

Don't beat yourself up.  In my opinion you can't go wrong if you are honest.

So I was married to an alcoholic for 20 years and my mom is very controlling, my SO has a recovering alcoholic mom and 2 brothers and an uBPDxw, my best friend has a bulimic step-daughter and a brother who struggles with drugs and alcohol... .See... .Everyone has people in their lives with problems and issues no matter what people say no one has a "perfect" life, don't feel bad for sharing your story.

[lexicat]

Thank you both for your kind words I often have this kind of anxious reaction when I share with people and it helps to read what you both wrote. I don't judge people who share with me and I don't know why I judge myself so harshly.

[Leaving]

Lexi,

Why don't you tell her that it was so nice talking to her the other day and that you feel very honored that she shared such intimate details about her personal life with you and that you just wanted to assure her that what she shared will remain completely private and will go no further.  She may be feeling the same as you and it will ease any vulnerability she may be feeling and she will most likely respond with the same and ease any that you are feeling.

[ecg790]

Hi Lexi 

I completely understand and can relate with you about the sharing of such a background. I think it is completely find because the setting was to open up about both of your families in which you both did. Our background (bad or good) are who make us who we are today. Many hear my story then look at me as if I am a walking miracle coming from such a dysfunctional childhood.

All in all, I believe that what you did was right. You were honest. 

[AloneAtLast]

You can come sit over here by me anytime.