Hey Everyone!
First off, I wanted to thank all of you who have been supportive to me over the past six months. You've all in your own ways helped me put behind one of the most difficult times in my life. I may still post on here from time to time but it will be hopefully more in a support role. Thank you all again.
Update:
Yesterday was the six month mark for me. On Dec 22 of last year I was painfully discarded by my ex gf. My story was very similar to all of yours. I spent the better part of last year dating someone who was so imperfectly perfect. I had never experienced a relationship of that emotional depth to that point in time. I met her about a year ago in Colorado. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. What would transpire for the next 6 1/2 months would be a roller coaster of emotion for me. Some highs but many lows. It was almost like a drug- trying to get back those so perfect moments that I wanted to last forever.
Like so many of you, I was discarded at the lowest point of my life. What preceded the discard was a period where I did everything in my power to make her happy. I gave her my heart and soul. I tried to make the dream come true.
Unfortunately, I should have walked away. See, I was playing a game of Tic-Tac-Toe that I was doomed to lose. I spent thousands of dollars, redirected my life plans, and dealt with months of compromises and frustrations for the hopes that she would treat me the way I deserved to be treated. That she would be that girl I had seen glimpses of.
When my money was about gone, I took a job with a company that I had bad feelings about just to survive. In a cruel twist of fate, that company would add to my misery by laying me off before Christmas.
Then Dec 22 happened.
I won't go into the details of what happened on that day. For all intensive purposes my relationship was over. She did talk to me for about two weeks after the discard but it was nothing of any substance. On Jan 3, she sent me a bunch of texts saying she never wanted to talk to me again.
And with that she was gone!
It was once said a man really finds himself when he is standing at the bottom of the abyss and he only sees his reflection.
I was at the bottom of the abyss.
The woman I loved was gone, I was without a job, and broke.
Heck, I didn't even know how I was going to pay my rent.
But, something strange happened.
Through all the pain and sadness, I developed a new, stronger self. A self not dependent on others for my own happiness. My mother once said to me that I needed to learn everything the hard way. I guess I had to learn to put my needs first and listen to my gut feelings.
In the past two relationships I failed to do that.
I will never make that mistake again. I still can love but I expect the same in return.
It has been a gradual healing. I still think about her. But it has been getting better everyday. It gets easier people! Eventually the pain will subside. Not to say I don't have periods where I get sad and miss her. I do. But I think I realize now that I did my best. She had a mental condition that I could not solve.
So, I guess for those of you who have been recently dumped or in the process of healing, my thoughts are with you. Hang in there! It may seem like the sun will never shine again. It will! And believe me, if you take this miserable experience as a life lesson you can undergo some incredible soul growth!
As for me, as I said before, thank you. I may post from time to time, but it will more be in a advisement capacity. I hope!
For those who have been on parallel journeys during the past six months with me I wish you peace and godspeed. Hopefully y'all will have the happiness you deserve.
Thank you Skip and the rest of the moderators. This site has helped me!
Thank you!
