Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
July 10, 2025, 01:53:40 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
84
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Do you hear their voice in your head?  (Read 466 times)
klacey3
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 256


« on: July 26, 2015, 09:29:13 AM »

I have been broken up for about a month now and trying to do no contact, apart from he is still finding ways to via email.

I have noticed recently I have had alot of thoughts with 'you' statements about myself. For example I thought about how I was getting along better with people at work and then the thought 'they are probably talking about you being your back' sprang to mind. Someone did something nice for me the other day and the thought 'you are so selfish and horrible' came to mind. I met my friends partner a while ago and she told me he thought I was nice and I thought 'he fell for your act of only pretending to be nice'

I didnt have thoughts in the 'you' tense before I met my ex. The content of these thoughts are very similar in theme to the things my undiagnosed BPD ex used to say. He often told me I was horrible, selfish, full of guilt and shame, thay everyone thinks im a psycho and im an attention seeking compulsive liar and game player.

So im pretty sure these thoughts i have about myself are related to him. I was just wondering of anyones thoughts about this or whether anyone has experienced similar?
Logged
SummerStorm
******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Friend
Posts: 926



« Reply #1 on: July 26, 2015, 01:14:14 PM »

All the time.  My mind has stripped away everything else and keeps alternating between the good things and the bad.  So, I constantly hear her voice saying, "I love you.  You are a poison.  You're the one.  Who could ever love you?  I miss you.  Shut the f___ up, you're so annoying." 
Logged

So when will this end it goes on and on/Over and over and over again/Keep spinning around I know that it won't stop/Till I step down from this for good - Lifehouse "Sick Cycle Carousel"
rotiroti
formerly neveragainthanks
******
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 758



« Reply #2 on: July 26, 2015, 01:25:16 PM »

I have been broken up for about a month now and trying to do no contact, apart from he is still finding ways to via email.

I have noticed recently I have had alot of thoughts with 'you' statements about myself. For example I thought about how I was getting along better with people at work and then the thought 'they are probably talking about you being your back' sprang to mind. Someone did something nice for me the other day and the thought 'you are so selfish and horrible' came to mind. I met my friends partner a while ago and she told me he thought I was nice and I thought 'he fell for your act of only pretending to be nice'

I didnt have thoughts in the 'you' tense before I met my ex. The content of these thoughts are very similar in theme to the things my undiagnosed BPD ex used to say. He often told me I was horrible, selfish, full of guilt and shame, thay everyone thinks im a psycho and im an attention seeking compulsive liar and game player.

So im pretty sure these thoughts i have about myself are related to him. I was just wondering of anyones thoughts about this or whether anyone has experienced similar?

It sounds like you are saying that in every relationship besides the one you had with your BPDex is healthy and that the one with the BPDex is the unhealthy one. I think that's a powerful insight
Logged
klacey3
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 256


« Reply #3 on: July 26, 2015, 01:56:14 PM »

I have been broken up for about a month now and trying to do no contact, apart from he is still finding ways to via email.

I have noticed recently I have had alot of thoughts with 'you' statements about myself. For example I thought about how I was getting along better with people at work and then the thought 'they are probably talking about you being your back' sprang to mind. Someone did something nice for me the other day and the thought 'you are so selfish and horrible' came to mind. I met my friends partner a while ago and she told me he thought I was nice and I thought 'he fell for your act of only pretending to be nice'

I didnt have thoughts in the 'you' tense before I met my ex. The content of these thoughts are very similar in theme to the things my undiagnosed BPD ex used to say. He often told me I was horrible, selfish, full of guilt and shame, thay everyone thinks im a psycho and im an attention seeking compulsive liar and game player.

So im pretty sure these thoughts i have about myself are related to him. I was just wondering of anyones thoughts about this or whether anyone has experienced similar?

It sounds like you are saying that in every relationship besides the one you had with your BPDex is healthy and that the one with the BPDex is the unhealthy one. I think that's a powerful insight

Well my relationships before this one were bad aswell but they were just immature and were not that interested to be with me, they didnt put me down and behave in a push pull way.

Logged
klacey3
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 256


« Reply #4 on: July 26, 2015, 02:07:36 PM »

All the time.  My mind has stripped away everything else and keeps alternating between the good things and the bad.  So, I constantly hear her voice saying, "I love you.  You are a poison.  You're the one.  Who could ever love you?  I miss you.  Shut the f___ up, you're so annoying." 

Sorry to hear. Are the voices actually hers or does it sound like your own?

I tend to hear what sounds like my own thoughts but I know it isnt as I think 'you' rather than 'i'.
Logged
rotiroti
formerly neveragainthanks
******
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 758



« Reply #5 on: July 26, 2015, 02:14:44 PM »

Excerpt
Well my relationships before this one were bad aswell but they were just immature and were not that interested to be with me, they didnt put me down and behave in a push pull way.

Sorry for not clarifying, I had meant relationships with friends and co-workers all seemed very normal and healthy, but that this romantic relationship especially was not
Logged
SummerStorm
******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Friend
Posts: 926



« Reply #6 on: July 26, 2015, 04:07:43 PM »

All the time.  My mind has stripped away everything else and keeps alternating between the good things and the bad.  So, I constantly hear her voice saying, "I love you.  You are a poison.  You're the one.  Who could ever love you?  I miss you.  Shut the f___ up, you're so annoying." 

Sorry to hear. Are the voices actually hers or does it sound like your own?

I tend to hear what sounds like my own thoughts but I know it isnt as I think 'you' rather than 'i'.

It depends.  Some of those things she said to me in a text, so I don't hear her voice.  Actually, I hear my voice, which is actually worse.  I basically hear my voice saying, "You are a poison." 

And I hear "I love you" in her voice, which is the worst.
Logged

So when will this end it goes on and on/Over and over and over again/Keep spinning around I know that it won't stop/Till I step down from this for good - Lifehouse "Sick Cycle Carousel"
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!