Hi,
If this is her normal way of handling stress, your feelings don't even get a look in. I understand the feelings you are having. I've been there before but the behavior was much more extreme. Breaking things, jumping out cars and running away then expecting me to chase after him all day. Its great that you are seeing the behavoir as abnormal. In the beginning I didn't even realize and I though it was my fault. Good luck with it all. There is a lot of support and articles that can help on this site.