I keep forgetting it has only been a month.

[Ashamedandangry]

I had such a hard day.  It seems like no matter how hard I try I can't seem to get over my exBPD.  I have to keep reminding myself that it has only been a month since he broke up with me.  How do I forget 7 years?  I think that what hurts the most is that the day he left he immediately moved in with the woman he had cheated on me with.  He accused me constantly of cheating on him when he was the one cheating throughout the entire 7 years of our relationship.  Why am I the one who continues to hurt, and cry and get angry but he gets to move on as if I never existed?  It's not fair.  I feel like I am slowly drowning.  Every time I start to think I am going to be ok and get through the heartache, the memory of him, his face just haunts me.  Sometimes I feel as if I will never get past the pain that just torments my heart.  I always say that if it were not for my children, ending my life would be so easy.  I love my children too much to ever do that.  I just don't want to feel anymore.  I want him erased from my heart and mind!

[C.Stein]

Oh my ... .did you just crawl into my head?

[cherryblossom]

It's horrible I feel for you -I too have said in recent weeks I feel "haunted".

It is hard to get your head around having such connection then abandonment

I was on the downturn again last few days -having intrusive positive memories / dreams about us but spending hours on here last night really helped me!

I have felt suicidal since my split but I wouldn't do that to my sister.

What I have found; as time goes on the bad days get less, plan some fun, rediscover lost interests, don't isolate too much, read inspirational stories, therapy, being around animals and this site. Stay strong and enjoy your children