I feel like I am very forget full- PTSD

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

Hello

I am well on my way into healing. Recently I notice that I am very forgetful of details in everyday life. I was talking to a friend whom is also a doctor, and he suggested that it is  PTSD I am experiencing now after divorcing my BPD/NPD/ASPD husband and almost 3 months of nc. We were married for 5 years and together 7 1/2 years. Since suffering so many years of abuse, this seems to make sense. Has anyone else experienced this- loss of memory on very common everyday things after leaving the BPD r/s? Or am I loosing my mind... LOL!

[mm1024]

Hello

I am well on my way into healing. Recently I notice that I am very forgetful of details in everyday life. I was talking to a friend whom is also a doctor, and he suggested that it is  PTSD I am experiencing now after divorcing my BPD/NPD/ASPD husband and almost 3 months of nc. We were married for 5 years and together 7 1/2 years. Since suffering so many years of abuse, this seems to make sense. Has anyone else experienced this- loss of memory on very common everyday things after leaving the BPD r/s? Or am I loosing my mind... LOL!

[fromheeltoheal]

No, you're finding your mind.  Long term abuse is traumatic, and now that you've ended it, and good for you, your brain needs time to rewire itself for your new reality.  Humans are resourceful, even folks in concentration camps developed ways to survive mentally, and you undoubtedly did the same; give yourself credit for that, but now that it's over, all of those resources you developed to survive in an abusive situation aren't being used for anything, and other resources you will need in your new reality may be underdeveloped.  All of that is confusing, so it takes a while to get your feet back on the ground, and 3 months is very little after 7 1/2 years so take it easy, one day at a time, one foot in front of the other. One cool thing is more will become clear with time as you untangle and fall in love with yourself all over again; it's a fun journey if you make it fun.  Take care of you!

[mm1024]

Thank you fromheeltoheal! What you said makes so much sense. Everyday recently things are more clear in that I am realizing so many of the warning signs I didnt see in the beginning of and within my marriage an r/s with my exBPDh. You are right, I did develop survival strategizes and tactics while in the r/s and marriage. This past week, I noticed I sleep better and wake up earlier. I was always an early riser and through the last years of my marriage and in the past 6 months or so, I have been rising later than normal. I think maybe mental exhaustion and PTS, were the culprit. I woke up energized this past week around 5:30-6am, ready to get up and going! Thank you for your support.

[Butterfly12]

YES.

I have been diagnosed with PTSD. My husband and I have been together almost 10 years. Two years ago just following the birth of our third child he was arrested for assaulting me, and only now am I really coping with this. We are still married and trying to work out whether we try to save our marriage or if he files for divorce. I have been a single mother to three for this time, and he has brief weekly visits. In this time he has manipulated, emotionally and verbally abused me, and alienated me from all our friends and family. The recovery for this has put me into shock... .and the daily discovery of realizing he is much much smarter then me is a bit of a blow. I am so distracted with the children, work, our farm and the overwhelming solo work of it all, my mind feels like a sieve.

I hear you.

[fromheeltoheal]

The recovery for this has put me into shock... .and the daily discovery of realizing he is much much smarter then me is a bit of a blow.

I used to think my ex was smarter than me too, but eventually I realized she was just focusing on one area full time, and we always get better at what we focus on: her fear of abandonment and lack of trust caused her to be hyper-vigilant full time, always workin' angles instead of communicating openly, always steeped in the drama, addicted to the chaos she called comfort.  I entered her world for a while, felt like I was going insane, extracted myself, and you might find as I did, as we give ourselves time and distance, that as the curtain gets pulled back on the game it is a shock at first, along with some bewilderment as to how far down we went, then anger at it, then pity, and eventually compassion for someone who lives in that hateful, chaotic place because they don't see an option, it's just how it is.  And the realization that we do have an option, life can get bright and free, is like a breath of fresh air, as the weight just floats off our shoulders and life gets really good.  There is light at the end of that tunnel, something to have faith in, move towards, anticipate; that's the path we're on for now, the path we're supposed to be on, a brand new day.  Take care of you!

[cloudten]

Yes, I have been incredibly forgetful. It is really hurting me at work. I was trying to communicate yesterday with my boss about something very important and was referring to the wrong days of the week, saying I worked on Saturday. It was completely bizarre. I just had to stop and say "i'm sorry- I have so much going on in my personal life. I don't know why my brain isn't working at the moment."  Probably not the PC thing to say to my boss, but I said it because I didn't know what else to say or how to explain why the words were coming out of my mouth all wrong.

Today I am struggling big time. Just emotionally overall. I can't get my brain to do anything.