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How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
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Author Topic: Anyone having bad dreams?  (Read 499 times)
burritoman
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 169


« on: December 09, 2015, 10:30:41 AM »

Over the last month of NC I've been having the occasional nightmare about her. It's strange because usually near the end of the day I'm feeling pretty good about myself and feel like I'm gaining some form of strength and clarity about the situation. They're different dreams, but they follow a similar premise. That being, she's there and I'm trying to communicate with her and rationalize talking about the relationship. I'm desperate and chasing her, which I didn't do at all during this breakup. I usually get more and more anxious and a bit scared because of the way she's treating me - always cold with a bit of a smirk on her face, almost as if to say "I've moved on, but I've got him right where I want him." Then in the end I get burned and finally give up. I wake up cold, sweaty, and anxious.

Every time I have a dream like this there's usually someone else involved. I remember in my first one I saw her out on a date, and when I'd try to talk to her the guy said something along the lines of "you screwed up man, she's a great girl." Then they ended up driving away in the same car as mine but a different color. In last night's dream her best friend was there, a girl I never actually met because she lives across the country. Her attitude was basically you deserve this, and she's better off without you. It makes me feel disposed of.

A part of me feels like these dreams are my desire for closure, which I certainly haven't gotten.

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hopealways
aka moving4ward
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 725


« Reply #1 on: December 09, 2015, 10:41:15 AM »

I have been dreaming of her every night the past week. They are nice dreams though. But the fact that they fill my sleep is not something I want in my life.
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LostGhost
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« Reply #2 on: December 10, 2015, 01:06:51 AM »

I have been dreaming of her every night the past week. They are nice dreams though. But the fact that they fill my sleep is not something I want in my life.

Same and I don't understand why it's happening. I've dreamed of her every single night since the breakup and it hasn't stopped. If my brain is trying to sort something out subconsciously, it's failing.  Good dreams, bad dreams, nightmares, strange dreams, sexual dreams - they're all there.

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neverloveagain
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 227



« Reply #3 on: December 10, 2015, 01:24:48 AM »

I'm 18 months nc since the end of my 10 year relationship. I still dream of my ex frequently and always find it gives the following day a dream hangover to speak. But there just your minds subconscious thoughts don't read to much into it. Stay strong.
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