hey chili36 and
youre in good company. i think many of us ask ourselves this question; i spent a couple of months myself thinking something was wrong with me for still having feelings for my ex. nothing was wrong with me, i was grieving.
you were in a twenty nine year marriage, chili36. it seems perfectly normal to me that you would miss this person. having said that, given the loaded bond of a relationship with a pwBPD, and as you describe, the heartache, cheating and lies, it also makes perfect sense that your feelings would be quite conflicted. you mention it has only been two months; detaching, healing, and resolving your feelings (seeing a bigger, clearer picture) are going to take time and processing and grieving. for that, again, you are in very good company. please keep reading and posting.
it helps to talk. would you like to tell us a bit more of your story so we can better understand your situation?
