The compartmentalization that you may be comfortable with doesn't allow the onlookers with the most at stake (the kids) to have any sense of solidity or predictability.
The pickle that I am in for the short term, is that a move towards divorce would worsen my problem about kids. It would escalate and follow her sisters model.
The kid thing/alienation will be topic 1 for me in counseling. We both know the rules, she just can't follow them when worked up.
Patientandclear,
I've had two separate lawyers retained for a while for some other employment law and contract issues. Some PI work has been done, and once again in my life, I get the joy of spending a lot of time on the phone with lawyers. (when I had my Navy commands I always had to chat with JAG guys). Wife knows all this. She has made some comments about me and my lawyers doing things (they are not divorce lawyers) to prep for divorce. I don't engage on that.
I highly doubt she knows about the L up here. We'll see.
FF