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How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
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Author Topic: Yup, I'm through  (Read 628 times)
SadDaddy

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 14


« on: February 12, 2016, 04:59:05 PM »

I'm tired of her. I treated her better than she deserved, better than she treated me at any point in our relationship, and she still can't do anything but throw it in my face. That's fine. SHe can take her bat**** insanity on down the road for the next stupid bleeding heart to deal with. Mine has bled enough and it bleeds NO MORE for her. She is little more than arrogant trash who had me mesmerized for too long.

I'm not scared of being without her, I'm scared of being alone. But little by little, I"ll stop feeling like a disgusting failure as her power over me and my emotions wanes. I'll remember how a real person feels and maybe someday I'll be able to feel happiness again.

I will spend the rest of my days telling anyone who will listen to avoid relationships with BPDs. It's not worth it and if I were a weaker man I'd have done something really stupid by now. It's not like she hasn't tried to goad me into it.
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adventurer
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: married
Posts: 224


« Reply #1 on: February 12, 2016, 06:27:27 PM »

I relate so much to where you are right now - although I'm still in this relationship - I'm not planning to be much longer.

I feel a lot of bitterness, I feel used, I feel upset.

I feel disappointed in both her and myself.

Don't hang onto these feelings too long, but keep them around enough to keep you from going back!  I've seen a lot of encouraging posts here from people who have made it out the other side, you WILL feel happiness again.

Now is a great time to start back worrying about YOU and rebuilding.  Work on the 'scared of being alone' part.  I need to do the same.

YOU GOT THIS!
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Driver
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 216


« Reply #2 on: February 12, 2016, 06:34:11 PM »

I'm tired of her. I treated her better than she deserved, better than she treated me at any point in our relationship, and she still can't do anything but throw it in my face. That's fine. SHe can take her bat**** insanity on down the road for the next stupid bleeding heart to deal with. Mine has bled enough and it bleeds NO MORE for her. She is little more than arrogant trash who had me mesmerized for too long.

I'm not scared of being without her, I'm scared of being alone. But little by little, I"ll stop feeling like a disgusting failure as her power over me and my emotions wanes. I'll remember how a real person feels and maybe someday I'll be able to feel happiness again.

I will spend the rest of my days telling anyone who will listen to avoid relationships with BPDs. It's not worth it and if I were a weaker man I'd have done something really stupid by now. It's not like she hasn't tried to goad me into it.

SadDaddy,

Sometimes it's better to be alone than with bad company. Sometimes, being alone gives you time and space to reflect where you are and what are the things you (do not) expect from your life.

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once removed
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 12626



« Reply #3 on: February 12, 2016, 07:46:06 PM »

I'm tired of her. I treated her better than she deserved, better than she treated me at any point in our relationship, and she still can't do anything but throw it in my face. That's fine. SHe can take her bat**** insanity on down the road for the next stupid bleeding heart to deal with. Mine has bled enough and it bleeds NO MORE for her. She is little more than arrogant trash who had me mesmerized for too long.

I'm not scared of being without her, I'm scared of being alone. But little by little, I"ll stop feeling like a disgusting failure as her power over me and my emotions wanes. I'll remember how a real person feels and maybe someday I'll be able to feel happiness again.

I will spend the rest of my days telling anyone who will listen to avoid relationships with BPDs. It's not worth it and if I were a weaker man I'd have done something really stupid by now. It's not like she hasn't tried to goad me into it.

SadDaddy,

Sometimes it's better to be alone than with bad company. Sometimes, being alone gives you time and space to reflect where you are and what are the things you (do not) expect from your life.

i agree. i also think it helps to see it as less being "alone" and more "being on your own". i think its an empowering alternative.

saddaddy, please dont forget you have your support group here Smiling (click to insert in post). do you have friends and family you can lean on in this process?

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