twilight zone

[adaw]

it is witching hour, 2 am, for those unfamiliar with the expression. she returned from a weekend with her kids and caught me doing research for my new novel. kissed me like a long lost lover. i made tea, not trusting the peace. with reason. i turned of the TV and shut my laptop down, i could see she was distraught.  i waited for her to talk to me, she didn't, she went on social media and started looking what her friends did the weekend. then asked me: were you not at the local pub last night?

here we go again, firstly im busy with the new novel and was focused on research. secondly i do not use alcohol, thirdly i am not interested in listening to a bunch of drunks singing karaoke, fourthly i am disabled and do not drive and the pub is miles away. this i kept to myself while she went on about the party i missed. i let her carry on. then kissed her good night and fell asleep. 2 am struck and she had nightmares. i was sleeping and she ranted that i woke her.

being able to read the signs i went looking for the cause and found the cause. a love letter to her ex-husband. he is engaged and she told him how much she still misses their road trips etc and that he could have waited before getting involved again, and i thought, she is picking on him, knowing that i won't be bullied. but here i am in the spare bedroom pissed off at her lies.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[lbjnltx]

Does it trigger you that your wife asks questions about what you did while she was away?  Is asking you if you went to the pub equal to an accusation in your mind? 

How long has she been divorced from her ex husband?

[HappyChappy]

Not the sort of thing any partner wants to find, I’m not surprised you’re pissed off. Do you think this is all about keeping you on your toes, “I hate you don’t leave me” style ? Was the letter very easy to find ?  You also say you think she’s picking on her ex, in what way ?

On another topic, I love your written style, loads of atmosphere in your short post.

[adaw]

she hides her phone and is paranoid that i am spying on her. she bought me a smartphone and i found a tracking app on it. the funny part is i am not the social type i am living as a recluse because of a serious back injury and because i am busy working on a novel. i went to a meeting with a mutual friend (also my only friend) without telling her. as i dont drive and can barely walk the guy picked me up. we had a long visit but the whole time i heard my friend's wife continuously affirming that i am still there. we laughed about it. when i got back home she was in a state. i ignored her and did the dishes ate a supper alone and went back to writing.

she used to bully her ex the same way she did to me, verbal and physical abuse. when i put down my foot and said enough she went back to manipulating him. they have estranged for four years.