Feeling really ANGRY

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

I'm feeling really angry today.  I left my exh w/uBPD on 2/27/16.  We are divorced.  Set a clear no-contact boundary which is is kind of respecting EXCEPT (yes, this is the source of my ANGER):

1) His son messaged me on FB saying sorry about you and dad and then a big long message about dad says he loves you and misses you.  I wrote back Thanks C.

2) The landlord (whom he stated he could not STAND) from the house that we shared dropped into my office today... .wanted to let me know something about her dad's business with my office and "on a more personal note, I am helping ex with his taxes and need your social security number".  I said no but I am FURIOUS!  He is on SSD and VA disability - non-taxable income.  No taxes must be filed.  I already filed taxes.  My refund has nothing to do with him - he did not pay any taxes.  Rrrrrrrgh! 

I got all crazy about this... .stewing all afternoon about what is the next trick... .she is his new chippie... .ug. 

Then got a checkin email from a mutual friend who we had very sporadic contact with.  Saying hi.  I told him we were divorced and got a mushy email back asking to stay friends.  I said OK but you don't talk to me about ex and you don't talk to ex about me.  I am feeling paranoid... Hate this. 

[LingeringNoMore]

I'm feeling really angry today.  I left my exh w/uBPD on 2/27/16.  We are divorced.  Set a clear no-contact boundary which is is kind of respecting EXCEPT (yes, this is the source of my ANGER):

1) His son messaged me on FB saying sorry about you and dad and then a big long message about dad says he loves you and misses you.  I wrote back Thanks C.

2) The landlord (whom he stated he could not STAND) from the house that we shared dropped into my office today... .wanted to let me know something about her dad's business with my office and "on a more personal note, I am helping ex with his taxes and need your social security number".  I said no but I am FURIOUS!  He is on SSD and VA disability - non-taxable income.  No taxes must be filed.  I already filed taxes.  My refund has nothing to do with him - he did not pay any taxes.  Rrrrrrrgh! 

I got all crazy about this... .stewing all afternoon about what is the next trick... .she is his new chippie... .ug. 

Then got a checkin email from a mutual friend who we had very sporadic contact with.  Saying hi.  I told him we were divorced and got a mushy email back asking to stay friends.  I said OK but you don't talk to me about ex and you don't talk to ex about me.  I am feeling paranoid... Hate this. 

[C.Stein]

This is very hard to deal with.  The continued reminder keeps the wound fresh.  It is unfortunately something you have to deal with for now.  Keep setting and maintaining your boundaries and try not to take this stuff personally.  I know it is easier said than done.  Feel free to blow off some steam here if you need to.   

[LingeringNoMore]

Thanks C.Stein.  I appreciate your compassion and guidance.  I am doing pretty good.  I am working with a T.  That helps.  I have had two experiences where he was attacking me in dreams.  Creepy. I guess I am processing the years of boundary crossings. 

I keep getting to the edge of crazy. 

[C.Stein]

I have had two experiences where he was attacking me in dreams.  Creepy. I guess I am processing the years of boundary crossings. 

How was he attacking you and how did you defend yourself?

I keep getting to the edge of crazy. 

Yea, I know that feeling all too well.  So many conflicting emotions raging inside you don't know up from down.  At times I am still very angry with my ex.  Or maybe a lot of that anger is at myself.  It is very difficult to reconcile anger and love when you are experiencing the emotions at the same time.