I did it.

[DontGiveUpOnMe]

I can't explain how at the moment, the whole thing was traumatic. It will probably haunt me but also be a good memory after time.

But I escaped more abuse, I'm living alone now Kind of unsure how I'll make it , or if I'll have enough money but for the past 3 nights I've been living alone... .please pray that this arrangement will work out ,I find out today if it will.

hopefully I'll be able to make it and never be abused again.

I just wanted to share good news for once.

[Kwamina]

Hi again DontGiveUpOnMe

Thanks for this awesome update! I have been following your posts for a long time and I am truly happy that you have managed to get out of that abusive environment

Explain more when you can, most important thing is that you are doing well and will continue to do well. I definitely hope that this will work out for you and you'll be able to continue this new living arrangement. I know how hard things have been for you and you moving out really is a significant and I believe positive change

Take care

The Board Parrot

[Naughty Nibbler]

    

Congrats on the good news.  Hope it works out for you!

[HappyChappy]

Hi DontGiveUpOnMe,

Wow, great news. I read your posts with interest. Thanks for sharing this. Would love to know the details if an when you’re ready to spill. Keep safe. I will pray for you.

[DontGiveUpOnMe]

Yes things have worked out really well, but emotionally I've still been kind of teeter tottering. I'm great because I'm finally free, it's weird because I don't know what to do with my newfound freedom, I'm so used to having even my thoughts dictated to me, freethinking being a transgressions that I keep behaving like I'm going to get punished... .but I've gotten better, it's definitely been strange.

The only thing is , the strange thing is... .my mother actually went no contact with me. Because of what happened. ( I'll have to explain when I'm less paranoid about them seeing my posts)

Are there instances of this where this happens? I mean, do you think her no contact might last in terms of how Bpds are? Or is this another trap?

[Forever to Roam]

I'm so glad for you, getting out of there. I really hope it works out for you.

It's hard, learning to think for yourself, learning who you actually are. But there is no doubt you can do it! You have proven you can do the hard things, simply by surviving this long.

My uBPD mom did the same thing - she cut me off first "because of what I did to her". Then she rescinded it and said it was me who actually had cut her off. After that it was a miserable sort of LC. A year ago I did actually cut the strings and say it was no more contact between us, and she has abided by it. I don't know if it's meant to be payback or not, if I'll find myself trapped one day by her. I dunno, but I'm grateful for every day it lasts. And I have a plan for what I'll do if she does try to trap me again.

Sending you all the good luck and prayers I have.

[Kwamina]

Fantastic news that things worked out so well

I can totally understand why this new situation would feel so weird though. You've lived a certain for very long and it will take some getting used to before you totally feel at ease in this new situation.

The only thing is , the strange thing is... .my mother actually went no contact with me. Because of what happened. ( I'll have to explain when I'm less paranoid about them seeing my posts)

Are there instances of this where this happens? I mean, do you think her no contact might last in terms of how Bpds are? Or is this another trap?

I have read many stories here of BPD family-members who use NC or the silent treatment to 'punish' others, for instance for perceived slights or perceived abandonments or rejections. Considering that BPD is a disorder and this kind of behavior stems from distorted thinking patterns, it could very well be that your mother feels she is justified to treat you this way. It is sad that things are this way, but you have the right to protect yourself against abuse and that's exactly what you did by moving out

It is difficult to tell at this point if your mother going NC will last. Would you still like to have some kind of relationship with her? Regardless of how you move forward with your mother, I think setting and enforcing/defending boundaries will be crucial.

Now that you have removed yourself from that difficult environment, I really encourage you to work on your healing, firstly by treating yourself with compassion and giving yourself time to transition into this new phase.

Take care

[Naughty Nibbler]

 

How great that your new living situation continues to work out for you.  Good thoughts and prayers your way, that you have a wonderful life ahead of you.

[drummerboy5]

Congrats on the escape... Keep your head up and stay strong! You can do it