Reall need help with this one.. why oh why the hardcore NC card?

[Bushido]

i just have to ask. .

okey i´m in a position of going thru divorce with my udBPDw.

I wanted to work thru the problems and have been trying to the last few years.

But 2 weeks after she moved out . . she cheated on me (but to her she didn´t cos she already moved out)

. . still she has been talking to this guy for 4 months. . . met him 4 times . . and then slept with him.

So okey . . i get it. . .  this divorce is happening!

But i have 4 kids with this woman . . . and i don´t see how i can just go NC?

Can someone . . . just anyone . . . tell me !

what the hell am i suppose to do?

All i want is to at least try to have good communication with her!

I´m not trying anything no more. . . this is her sh... and she has to deal with it.!

I gave her everything i possibly could to try make things work. . .

. . But she still kicks me down and calls me the bad guy!

our psychiatrist knows, our kids psychiatrist knows . . . and not cos i told them . . I SHOWED THEM!

same with our marriage counselor!

But dispite all . . . there is no NC possible . . .we have 4 kids.

all i want is to keep things cool and move on with my life.

But still . . that means to keep things good between me and my co parenting partner ... .

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Kwamina]

Hi bushido,

This is a very tough situation to be in indeed. There are kids involved which would definitely make it very difficult to be completely NC. I think you could perhaps benefit from reading the stories and material on the Co-parenting board:

Co-parenting after the Split

In the right-hand side margin of the board you will find tools and lessons that can help with successful shared parenting. I encourage you to take a look at those resources.

How are your kids dealing with this situation? What kind of relationship do your kids currently have with their mother?

Take care

[Bushido]

This is a very tough situation to be in indeed. There are kids involved which would definitely make it very difficult to be completely NC. I think you could perhaps benefit from reading the stories and material on the Co-parenting board:

Co-parenting after the Split

How are your kids dealing with this situation? What kind of relationship do your kids currently have with their mother?

thx... i´m going to check the co-parenting board...

the kids are adapting alright...

... .well . . the relationship pretty good i guess . . you know . . in her kind of way.

she does her best with what she´s got...

i just have no idea what her next move is...

i mean . . . she lives with her parents for god sake!

with 4 kids and a dog 

well . . .we´ll see i guess