Perspective...

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

I just heard 1 out 3 women have BPD and 1 out of 4 men have BPD... .that puts a little perspective in this. They also said that we(the nons) try to do all of our detective work just like a murder mystery... .trying to find the murder weapon. All of our "detective" work to figure out what they did and why... .it's natural. I feel normal... . 

[Herodias]

I just heard 1 out 3 women have BPD and 1 out of 4 men have BPD... .that puts a little perspective in this. They also said that we(the nons) try to do all of our detective work just like a murder mystery... .trying to find the murder weapon. All of our "detective" work to figure out what they did and why... .it's natural. I feel normal... . 

[JerryRG]

Hey Herodias

Not sure about the statistics but I grew up in an alcoholic home so I learned that if I were to survive I better start figuring these folks out and quick. I believe that set me up for my present state of mind and my relationships. I married a known drug addict and had 3 children, I find another drug addict and have another child. Yes there is an unhealthy pattern going on here.

If I spent my mental energy on productive things instead of trying to understand irrational behaviours I would be much further ahead in life and I'm sure much more content.

Have a great day Blue

[Sunfl0wer]

Please include your source for such information so we may decide how to interpret that.  That sounds extremely inaccurate.

[Herodias]

I'm listening to one of the best explanations of BPD ever! On u-tube, Ashley Berges- "in a relationship with a borderline"! She has it down to even my dating my husband in the beginning and what happened! Now I feel confident that is what he is - BPD- you all know I've been questioning it- this video is great.

[C.Stein]

I just heard 1 out 3 women have BPD and 1 out of 4 men have BPD

Blue, I caution you on using/believing sources of information that are not referenced to credible and verifiable sources.

Check this one.

www.nimh.nih.gov/news/science-news/2007/national-survey-tracks-prevalence-of-personality-disorders-in-us-population.shtml

[JerryRG]

Wanted to thank you Blue for the video link, this fits my ex perfectly and helps me understand what happened

[Herodias]

Thank you for the link C.Stein... .I will take a look there. I understand what you are saying about putting too much into what I hear and read online... .but for some reason, this person really hits home for me. Jerry, you are welcome... .I am really thinking this therapist has it down precisely, since she had a few relationships with these people too. I am listening to the one that says "are you having sex with a borderline?"   It makes perfect sense in how they hook you... .I like that she talks about how to stay in a relationship with them if they are willing to have weekly therapy too.

[Hadlee]

I am really thinking this therapist has it down precisely, since she had a few relationships with these people too.

She's a therapist and has been with a FEW borderlines?  Wouldn't a therapist know better than to go back for more?  Interesting.

[Herodias]

I am really thinking this therapist has it down precisely, since she had a few relationships with these people too.

She's a therapist and has been with a FEW borderlines?  Wouldn't a therapist know better than to go back for more?  Interesting.

I guess she is a licensed Counselor  (LPC)... .I suppose she got into mental health after her relationships... .I could see that. I have been told I should go into the field as interested a I am... .only thing is, I don't think I want to deal with these people anymore. I think I have had enough. I think allot of people go into the field due to relationships with people being mentally ill, parents or otherwise.

[Hadlee]

Good point

I also have thought about changing careers and get into counselling.  But, like you, I don't want anything to do with another BPD.