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How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
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Author Topic: knowing the truth has given me closure  (Read 593 times)
married21years
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« on: May 12, 2016, 09:38:34 AM »
knowing that i have been lied to and cheated on has given me closure.

knowing that this person has caused all this and lied and cheated on me, whilst painting me black has let me walk away

the truth sets us free.

she is sleeping with my best friend. her best friends husband, her best friend and other married men!

i know all this now and she dosnt know i know! 

divorce time!  Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)

i am free with no obligation and going NC for the rest of my life!


       Smiling (click to insert in post) Smiling (click to insert in post) Smiling (click to insert in post) Smiling (click to insert in post) Smiling (click to insert in post) Smiling (click to insert in post) Smiling (click to insert in post) Smiling (click to insert in post)
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Lucky Jim
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« Reply #1 on: May 12, 2016, 01:55:32 PM »
Sorry to hear, after 21 years of marriage.  Sometimes parting ways is best for all.  LuckyJim
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    A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.
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married21years
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« Reply #2 on: May 13, 2016, 02:52:12 AM »
Quote from: Lucky Jim on May 12, 2016, 01:55:32 PM
Sorry to hear, after 21 years of marriage.  Sometimes parting ways is best for all.  LuckyJim

thx bud 22 years, but it was one way all me giving and her rewriting history and taking

i am free just the divorce to go!
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Fr4nz
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« Reply #3 on: May 13, 2016, 03:03:06 AM »
Wow, sorry man!

Anyway, don't blame yourself, BPDs are often prone to such behaviours.
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married21years
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« Reply #4 on: May 13, 2016, 04:02:10 AM »
the truth has set me free from any blame,

i got access to exatly what she was saying recently

apparently i was crap in bed ROFLMFAO   Laugh out loud (click to insert in post)

she has painted me black and made me the villan to her victim

and her knight in shinning armer she wants to rescue her just wants sex

she is 40 he is 64 yo fat and bald  hahaha thanks for taking this posinous harpy of my hands

so she is making him jealous with a 52yo married man.

her life is just one big train wreck, i am just sitting back eating popcorn

she had everything, she has lost it. divorce time!

i have a wonderfull woman that genuinly loves me and adores me let the good times role!  Smiling (click to insert in post) Smiling (click to insert in post)
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Sunfl0wer
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« Reply #5 on: May 13, 2016, 05:21:51 AM »
Excerpt
the truth has set me free from any blame,

Attention(click to insert in post)

While it sounds like you were unaware of many things about her, there is also a dynamic within the relationship of you two that is likely dysfunctional even when you put her cheating behaviors aside.  At some point you may want to take a look at your role in how this relationship served you and 'functioned' for you.

22 years is a long time.  I imagine it will take some time to process.
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How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.~Anais Nin
married21years
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« Reply #6 on: May 13, 2016, 06:05:02 AM »
Quote from: Sunfl0wer on May 13, 2016, 05:21:51 AM
Excerpt
the truth has set me free from any blame,

Attention(click to insert in post)

While it sounds like you were unaware of many things about her, there is also a dynamic within the relationship of you two that is likely dysfunctional even when you put her cheating behaviors aside.  At some point you may want to take a look at your role in how this relationship served you and 'functioned' for you.

22 years is a long time.  I imagine it will take some time to process.

once i became aware i adressed it i was meet with lies

the vortex of confusion created by the lies kept me trying to help.

the truth has set me free i take no blame trying to honestly trying to help someone!
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once removed
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« Reply #7 on: May 13, 2016, 06:08:28 AM »
twenty two years is a long time to know anyone, let alone to be married to them. theres a lot of history there.

you may feel a sense of relief right now, and i wouldnt blame you, but finding out about this behavior behind your back cant feel good. dont hesitate to feel all of your feelings. we are here for you every step of the way.
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     and I think it's gonna be all right; yeah; the worst is over now; the mornin' sun is shinin' like a red rubber ball…
married21years
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« Reply #8 on: May 19, 2016, 06:47:13 AM »
Quote from: once removed on May 13, 2016, 06:08:28 AM
twenty two years is a long time to know anyone, let alone to be married to them. theres a lot of history there.

you may feel a sense of relief right now, and i wouldnt blame you, but finding out about this behavior behind your back cant feel good. dont hesitate to feel all of your feelings. we are here for you every step of the way.

the pain is emense but i am working through it and moving on  thx all 
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