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Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits. Practicing lawyer, Senior Family Mediator, and former Licensed Clinical Social Worker with twelve years’ experience and an expert on navigating the Family Court process.
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Author Topic: I asked for diapers, and I got #### too  (Read 605 times)
JerryRG
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1832


« on: September 08, 2016, 08:12:56 PM »

I asked my son's mother for diapers, wipes, and rash cream for our son. That's all.

I got some lengthy emails and she told me she has a fever of 103 for the past 3 day, has a new oncologist and she is going to the doctor tomorrow.

I did not respond, she has no respect for bounderies and I'm mot sure it's intentional or not.

She seems to just not have control over her need for attention? It is strange to witness now that the fog has cleared.

I'm fine but tired, I'm seeing her more clearly every day, and it is so heart breaking. She puts up a front of being well and I know she's dying inside.

Nothing I can do but pray, the anger and hate I felt toward her is transitioning into pity and compassion.

I should be happy for this, and my life is wonderful, I hope she gets hers in a good place. Not sure she's even aware of just how horrible she's doing.
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Turkish
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: "Divorced"/abandoned by SO in Feb 2014; Mother with BPD, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety: RIP in 2021.
Posts: 12183


Dad to my wolf pack


« Reply #1 on: September 08, 2016, 10:50:54 PM »

It sounds like you're pretty much alone in this.  When I have the kids,  I think of myself as a single parent.  In the past,  she's offered to help,  like when the kids were sick,  offering to come over (!).

Maybe you can rely on her now and then for this and that,  but it may be more helpful to think of yourself as a single dad,  Jerry,  at least when you have your son.
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    “For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.” ― Rudyard Kipling
valet
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 966


« Reply #2 on: September 08, 2016, 11:02:35 PM »

I agree with Turkish. I think that's a better way to approach what you're looking at right now.
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JerryRG
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1832


« Reply #3 on: September 09, 2016, 12:57:21 AM »

Thanks Turkish

I asked her to please refrain from talking about her health issues. She completely shut me down, got defensive, offensive and now making me wait to hear when and where she will help. She also said she's leaving town for the weekend, this just came up between emails.

What mother does not wish to be with their only child?

She hasn't seen him in a week and already planning 4 more days away?
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Splitblack4good
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
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« Reply #4 on: September 09, 2016, 04:20:31 AM »

Thanks Turkish

I asked her to please refrain from talking about her health issues. She completely shut me down, got defensive, offensive and now making me wait to hear when and where she will help. She also said she's leaving town for the weekend, this just came up between emails.

What mother does not wish to be with their only child?

She hasn't seen him in a week and already planning 4 more days away?
jerryRG I can relate to this . My ex went on holiday with her new partner back in July for a week and didn't even ask how her son was I had him for 2 weeks straight . It was me contacting her while she was on holiday regards to him . He's only 6 months old and needed his mother but all she was worried about was her having a good time on holiday with my replacment ! Makes me so angry at times you just have roll with it if you try and reason with them in an adult way it just makes them worse .
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