After many recycles and pain met her today and I'm over her IT CAN Happen

[Confused99]

I have posted my story before.  Was together and married for 7 long years. The cheating, fighting, games were crazy.  Cops lived at our House. She was a complete mental case and I knew it but could not let go.  When she had an affair it absolutely crippled me.  She divorced me and moved in with another guy.  I had trouble walking let alone sleeping for more then 10 minutes af a time.  

After months she came crawling back saying she messed up and the other guy was crazy.  I took her back for another miserable year.  It ended again with cheating.   This cycle repeated itself a few times but shorter and shorter.  She kept meeting "the love of her life" over and over

Well today after a long period of no contact I met her for lunch and listened to how every guy is crazy and she is so over dating and wants me back.  I simply can not express how good it felt to say sorry not interested and walk away.  And not just words.  I really am over her.  She even asked to have sex in restaurant bathroom.  She always used her body to get me and others.  I declinded.  I could not believe it but wanted no part of her

For all of you suffering I never believed I could get here.  My life was dark.  My thoughts were darker.  I couldn't live and survive without her.  But I put one foot in front of other and made it.  She told me about other guys.  No effect on me.  Zero.  Hang in there everyone and believe in yourself

[petedrexler]

this is awesome, Confused99! I'm so happy for you, and your story gives me hope! Keep rockin' it. 

[Sadly]

Thank you, well done, am so really happy for you and thanks for posting the good news here.
Love from Sadly x

[Milka]

Confused99 this is excellent! You walked a long, painful road but you got there in the end and finally you can begin living your life to the fullest! 

[Curiously1]

Great news! You just did not could not care   She sounds so desperate too!
Thanks for sharing

[Kelli Cornett]

She must be in a really bad place to feel the need to resort to contacting you.

Good thing you didn't take the bait.

[Anez]

Congrats, confused! that is awesome. And not taking the bait on sex in the restaurant bathroom is great, too. What's with BPDs and sex in public? Mine enjoyed doing things in risky places, too.

Thanks for sharing. It really is about seeing how these cycles just keep repeating themselves. We all wonder if we can "fix" them or if they can be "normal" in the right circumstances. But that can never really happen. It's not in the cards for people with BPD.

once we accept that and let it really sink in and rewire our brains around it, recovery becomes more clear.

congrats to you!

[JerryRG]

Way to go Confused99

You saved yourself a great deal of trouble

My therapist always told me, Jerry, we see a tiger ready to tear you to shreads and you insist she's a kitten. You're going to be devoured one day and all you need to do is run.

Congratulations again