WTH is she doing?

[JerryRG]

Did my son's mother walk away from him for good?

Wht is more important than our son?

Wth do I have to do this alone?

I'm so tired of this, I'm defeated.

[Turkish]

If it seems like she's abandoned your son,  it might be time to push your lawyer into taking action.  You last said he wanted to wait.  Maybe she's walked away from him for good,  effectively,  but she's likely to reengage at some level,  at some time. 

Now is the time to cut her loose from who she should be,  whom you expect her to be.  You have a good position.  You have the support of her family.  I'd take the money and run,  so to speak, for you and your son. 

[Sadly]

Dear Jerry
You are so not defeated. You are exhausted. It doesn't matter what she wants, she's no good as a partner and no good as a mother and you are both so much better off without her.
If your son was being bullied at school what would your advice be to him. Stay away from the bullies, let them be, ignore them and they will find someone else because they are not getting a reaction. They are not nice people and you don't need or want them in your life.? Try thinking what advice you would give him.
Get rid of the idea that any crappy old mother is better than no mother as its not true and please love, try to stop trying to understand her, you can't, won't and never will. Also as Turkish says, speak to your lawyer, there couldn't be a better time, how much longer does he need to wait. Don't forget Jerry, you are paying him, tell him what you want. How long is it now since she has had your son with her? You said before your ex admitted to her own mother the child would be better off without her, will her mother give a written statement?
I think you are tying yourself in knots trying to understand your ex and you really don't need to, you have enough on your plate. One day at a time Jerry.   x

[enlighten me]

Hi jerry I dont know your full story or what your ex is like. What I will say is my ex wife walked away from our sons. It was only for a short time but her motivation was anger. She is now desperately trying to re engage with them but they are having none of it.

What do you think her motivation is? Is she just being selfish or could it be that she thinks its the best for your son? Could it be shes so hurt that any contact with you is painful beyond belief for her?

You know her better than any of us could one of those fit the bill?

I sympathise with you as its hard enough to raise children on your own without having to deal with an ex who has mental health issues.

[JerryRG]

Thank you everyone

I don't know what she's thinking, I haven't initiated contact with her for many months. She did say in one message that I raped her, beat her and killed her.

She's obviously triggered by something strange. Her mother believes her daughter believes she's not well enough to care for our son. I immediately respond with asking why doesn't she get help, get well so she can be a good parent. Then I realize she doesn't think like most people so applying logic isn't going to work any better now than it did in the past.

She's giving up, she's angered her entire family, alienated them once again. They all tell me to just let her ruin her life, she's not worth thinking about. They have all detached years ago and expect nothing but the same.

I've been sick again, this cold or virus just hangs on for weeks or it's the chemo, I am fighting to have my son and for him to be safe and I'm going to have to give him up anyway. I'm not going to get better. The chemo wins.

He's sleeping right now, I don't know if I'm able to even get him in the tub before day care, or if I can work, so this is making very angry and frustrated.

My baby needs a healthy father. I don't know how long I can be of any help to him. I don't understand any of this.