Do they change or is it just a charm

[fromheeltoheal]

I've never felt this way about anyone before, since the day I met her I never wanted another woman, I only wanted her I thought I had found the love of my life, the person I had been waiting all my life to meet

I can't stop remembering that good period where she was my soul mate. I miss the good days so much and now she's being so good to me again!

So here's something cool: a borderline attaches to someone by mirroring them, by showing them the good they see in them, to create the emotional attachment yes, a borderline must have an attachment, but also to take on that good as their own; the disorder is such that a borderline is psychically fusing with someone else to create a whole person, which is not what we expect generally, what we expect is two autonomous individuals with their own selves creating a partnership between them called a relationship.  So point is that love of your life, that soul mate, might have been the good she saw in you reflected back to you, the you you've always wanted, so the person you fell in love with was yourself.  Ain't that cool?

I've read all this before actually especially about the borderline mimicking us hence we fall in love with ourselves

So considering it again, how does that make you feel Confused?  Does it change your perception of her at all?

[Confusedpe]

I've never felt this way about anyone before, since the day I met her I never wanted another woman, I only wanted her I thought I had found the love of my life, the person I had been waiting all my life to meet

I can't stop remembering that good period where she was my soul mate. I miss the good days so much and now she's being so good to me again!

So here's something cool: a borderline attaches to someone by mirroring them, by showing them the good they see in them, to create the emotional attachment yes, a borderline must have an attachment, but also to take on that good as their own; the disorder is such that a borderline is psychically fusing with someone else to create a whole person, which is not what we expect generally, what we expect is two autonomous individuals with their own selves creating a partnership between them called a relationship.  So point is that love of your life, that soul mate, might have been the good she saw in you reflected back to you, the you you've always wanted, so the person you fell in love with was yourself.  Ain't that cool?

I've read all this before actually especially about the borderline mimicking us hence we fall in love with ourselves

So considering it again, how does that make you feel Confused?  Does it change your perception of her at all?

In in some sort of denial honestly
It could be my inner narcissism that's not allowing me to accept the reality

[fromheeltoheal]

So considering it again, how does that make you feel Confused?  :)oes it change your perception of her at all?

In in some sort of denial honestly
It could be my inner narcissism that's not allowing me to accept the reality

We're all a little narcissistic, we have to be, otherwise we wouldn't have an ego and a self.  Could it be that you have resistance to accepting what it really was because it's very different from what you thought it was and changing that perception would hurt?

[Confusedpe]

So considering it again, how does that make you feel Confused?  :)oes it change your perception of her at all?

In in some sort of denial honestly
It could be my inner narcissism that's not allowing me to accept the reality

It's my
We're all a little narcissistic, we have to be, otherwise we wouldn't have an ego and a self.  Could it be that you have resistance to accepting what it really was because it's very different from what you thought it was and changing that perception would hurt?

It's a broken dream, that's what it is... .I live in hope, in a way I hope my decisions are correct but she strings me along with hope, that's the cruelest thing you can do to a human! I would give anything to have been happy with her