I need help

[lara10]

Hello,
I am new here. I was always unsure why my boyfriend acts always very strangely. I always thought he needed help, but I didn't know exactly what he had. I have read recently about BPD and it fits him very well. I am really in love with him but, at the same time I am completley exhausted. He does change but it is a very slow process. I am tired but I still want to stay with him and I hope he does change. I am mostly tired of how he seems a lot of the times selfish ( or he is more concentrated about his own emotions), about how moody he is and extreme in his reactions he may dump me because he was feeling sad then return to me the next day and he expects me to tolerate it! If I criticize him or ask him to change, instead of saying sorry his replies will be very aggressive. Sometimes the way he wants to always grab my attention is very childish ! he already knows I love him, but he always wants to make me jealous, or grab my attention in anyway which I find so unnecessary.  I tried leaving him a couple of times saying that I'm tired, he may improve for a short time then he'd go back. I really love him and he has a good heart. I really need help in how to deal with him especially the selfishness part! Is he really selfish? how to make him more aware of my emotions? because even when i speak to him, he finds his emotions more extreme then they're more important. I'd really appreciate help! Thank you!

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Lockjaw]

My GF is the same way. She is all about telling me what I need to work on, let me tell her something she needs to work on, and let the games begin. She doesn't hear, doesn't validate, doesn't accept anything I have to say.

A BP sees themself in a very poor light. So they cannot process that they have "things" they need to work on. They are either all good or all bad.