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Author Topic: jealous husband 90yrs old  (Read 344 times)
emem
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Posts: 1


« on: January 18, 2017, 05:16:57 PM »

My partner of 6 years is 90yrs old. I am 84.  We have shared an address since 2012
He is quick to accuse me if I go out on my own, and don't get back precisely when he expects me.
Accuses me of infidelity, mistrusts me, until I am in tears.
He eventually apologises, but never admits he is wrong.
There is a peaceful lull when he flatters me, does lots to please me, is pleased to have me as a show piece and uses me when he's of the mind. 
I have completely subjected my life to him - I no longer drive because he doesn't trust my judgement. He insists on doing all the cooking, (as long as I do all the cleaning up, and he is a wall-to-wall cook, using nearly every tool in the kitchen) and I can't go out on my own as he doesn't trust me. 
But as soon as we are out with the public, he overdoes the |"gentleman" bit for show. 
He is ridiculously conceited, (with good cause from a very colourful life), Begins almost everything he says with "I" or "MY"

Now the good bits, he is handsome, generous, fixated on Sudoko, and craves flattery about his singing.

Tonight, he said I had better go off and do what I wanted to - he won't stop me - because when he came out of choir practice, I was talking to a choir visitor about him and his Navy experience. Normally he can't wait to brag about his own Navy days, then he accused this gentleman I was talking to, of glaring at him "nastily".

I feel like giving up and leaving him - but hell, he is 90, and I'm sure could not look after himself.  He refuses to marry me in case I cheat him out of his money, (we keep our finances separate).
Where do I start?
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Mutt
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Divorced Oct 2015
Posts: 10395



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« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2017, 09:28:01 PM »

Hi emem,

Welcome

I'd like to welcome you to  bpdfamily. I'm sorry to hear that  I can see how that would feel like you're walking on eggshells when you have to step out of the house. Is he diagnosed with BPD?
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