How to Protect children from the negative behavior.

[lmnd]

I believe my wife is BPD.  We have been in marriage counseling and our Psychologist says that he can argue that she is or isn't BPD.   I want to know how to protect my children both are young.  I have asked my psychologist and has not given me an answer. My wife rages on me and sometimes at the children.  She knows she has an anger problem.  Many times this happens when I am not home.  They have also seen her become agressive with me hitting, pushing, throwing objects, biting me as well.  When she is raging at me its usually in front of the kids and she cant turn it off.  My eldest child will yell and come and hit me as well,  the little one will usually cry and want me to pick him up.  Leaving has not worked she will block me from the door push me back and I am left trying to comfort my children, and her becoming more upset that they are getting attention from me.  I have asked her many times to not do this in front of the kids.

She will also mock them and belittle them with her words.  She tells them directly that they are too needy.  If they prefer me over her she will get upset and say things to them such as " I never thought you would want daddy more than me"  She will tell them to "grow up" or "get over it"  if they are crying about something.  Very rarely will she console them.  There are way to many examples to list about the neg behavior. What do I do?

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[drained1996]

Hi Imnd, sorry to hear about your very difficult circumstances.  I too would be very worried about my children if I were in your situation.  You're doing the right thing in seeking therapy and reaching out here!  I may suggest if you don't feel you are getting direction from your current therapist to possibly look for another.  I had to go to a few different ones to find the one that I felt was a good fit for me. 
There are some immediate things you can do that could very well improve your situation.  First, understand that we cannot change them (that's on them), but we can change how we react to and communicate with them.  I found that many times the way I reacted to my pwBPD really only exacerbated the situation.  In the upper right margin of this page you will see some tools and lessons.  These are designed to help you control what you can and improve your situation. 
Have you read the book Stop Walking on Eggshells?  Good start if you have not.
You've found a great place for knowledge, understanding and sharing.  Keep posting!