Undiagnosed

[Depression = 72% of members]

Thank you for providing this forum! My spouse is in a treatment program for 90 days and so far is undiagnosed or diagnosed only as having childhood trauma. I am convinced from reading a few books by Randi Kreger and reflecting on my journal over the past 3 years that she has BPD. I have a therapist, a men's group, a support group and the staff at the inpatient facility to help me. I am struggling because I am not hearing the staff and psychiatrist call out the "real issue" and I am not sure she will get on the path of healing until the right therapies are applied to her treatment. I know the 3 C's (didn't cause, can't cure and can't control) but I am early in this process so I know I need to stand back. I'm exhausted, isolated and confused.

[Jeffbob]

Thank you for providing this forum! My spouse is in a treatment program for 90 days and so far is undiagnosed or diagnosed only as having childhood trauma. I am convinced from reading a few books by Randi Kreger and reflecting on my journal over the past 3 years that she has BPD. I have a therapist, a men's group, a support group and the staff at the inpatient facility to help me. I am struggling because I am not hearing the staff and psychiatrist call out the "real issue" and I am not sure she will get on the path of healing until the right therapies are applied to her treatment. I know the 3 C's (didn't cause, can't cure and can't control) but I am early in this process so I know I need to stand back. I'm exhausted, isolated and confused.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Notwendy]

Sometimes mental health professionals first look at symptoms like depression, anxiety, childhood trauma. BPD involves denial and so, these other "labels" may feel more acceptable to the person they are working with. Using BPD as a label may cause her to split on them and refuse to cooperate.

DBT seems to be the choice of therapy for BPD but it's not only a BPD therapy. If there is also depression or anxiety- medication/therapy for that may help. None of these are specific "cures" for BPD and how someone responds to therapy isn't predictable.

Understanable that you want the validation that they are on the right track. On their part, they are probably trying to establish a working relationship with your wife. It's also likely she will need on going mental health after the 90 days. If another "label" keeps her involved, it may be better than confronting her with BPD right away.