>how to respond to irrational behaviors/words

[owossobiker]

I am so frustrated when he assumes how I feel about things and doesn't check with me.  He makes up a whole story based on his assumptions about my motivations.  We've been married 54 years and he still fears abandonment.  How can I convince him I'm here to stay?  It seems futile to try to convince him.  Am I just reinforcing his irrational thoughts?

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[scribble]

That must feel exhausting after so much time. I relate with the frustration of my pwbpd not taking my perspective and making assumptions about my own intentions. Is he working with a therapist? I feel like that’s the only way for many people with behaviors like this to learn how to do things differently and think differently.