Newbie here... daughter may have BPD

[jofalltrades]

What type of relationship are you in?
23yo Daughter - suspected BPD
 
Who else (if anyone), in child's family, has BPD?
Not sure, but likely aunts, cousins, 2nd cousins, etc.
 
What is your child's strongest quality?
Incredibly bright, intensely cares for the world (environment, socio-political matters, etc.)
 
What are the top challenges your child is facing?
Forming relationships, feeling worthy, fear of abandonment... also spends a lot of energy stressing about things far beyond her circle of influence/control.
 
What do you find most difficult in dealing with your child?
She has so much going for her, but she is so miserable and sad and frustrated.  I can't relate to her the way I wish I could.  I also have "parental guilt", even though rationally I know this is not my fault.
 
How would you categorize your child? Diagnosed? Undiagnosed?
Undiagnosed at the moment, but currently in partial hospitalization program where it's started to bubble up as a possibility.
 
What do you struggle with yourself?
Mild depression, but well controlled with medication.  My kids would say I'm not "sensitive" enough, and maybe not as affectionate as they wish.
 
Is anyone in therapy? Child? Parents?
 If so, what types?
uBPDd - PHP, talk therapy - prob will start IOC DBT soon
 
What are your goals at bpdfamily.com?
support and guidance - pretty overwhelmed at the moment
 
TAKE THE PLEDGE HERE

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Sancho]

Hello Jofalltrades
Welcome to the family. I am glad you have found your way here, although the reason we find ourselves here is because we are dealing with incredibly difficult circumstances.

Just coming here has always been helpful to me because BPD is a lonely journey - or it was/is in my case. It's one of those things that other people don't really understand or give advice that is more suited to the general population - not someone with this complex illness.

So here I feel at home, not alone and these things are so helpful.

I hope you have time to read some of the information available here and to browse through the posts. There are many different types of relationships affected by BPD and the journey is not easy. I hope this is a place that supports you on the journey as it does for me.

Thanks for posting. It means so much to all of us when someone is prepared to post. I remember thinking about posting for the first time. My DD had me in such a state that I was a bit paranoid about posting - would she find out, was I breaking her trust in me etc. I was so caught up in the BPD web I was worried about just posting a few things here!

When I took the step and read the posts, it was a game changer - not in the sense of making things easier in my day to day life, but knowing what BPD looked like in everyday life and that I was not alone in experiencing the crazy journey of BPD.

I hope you find support here too.