Hello, I am so glad that I found this group. The last 2 years of our marriage have been challenging, the roller coaster is real (cheating /devaluation /hateful attitude and comments /criticism / jealousy / control vs apologies, begging not to leave, caring behaviour - short-lived though). Only now I am starting to recognize my part in this and how I abandoned myself for the sake of the marriage, and to try to keep him happy. I think that I am past the suffering, tears, and victim mode ... I still get triggered, but I am starting to not care ... I am not sure if I have already passed the point of no return ... I don´t see him willing to make any efforts (even though he has said he wants to try) ... Thank you for reading ... hope to get more clarity through your experiences and comments.
PD: Just wanted to clarify that he has not been diagnosed, but he checks almost all the marks (except self-harm behaviours). Two years ago, I begged him to start couple´s therapy and he strongly refused, he doesn´t believe in therapy