Hey, it's been 10 years since I separated from my "highly functional" bpd. I am still angry at her and at myself for letting myself get taken advantage of for so many years.
I'm just curious- why are you still angry at her? And why at yourself?
I realize how chaotic these breakups are; I was married for 23 years and separated for almost 3 years now. And I remember that lingering anger all too well. It ate at me until I finally decided to let it all go.
Think about it. You're still angry. She's probably living her best life...until it all falls apart...then she lives her best life all over again. Why allow her actions that stemmed from mental health affect you all these years later?
I believe that you were taken advantage of, I was as well in basically every possible way. But you know what- I did that, I accepted that as my reality and let my ex do all sorts of unhealthy things. It was just as much my fault as it was hers, because after all...I did stay for 23 years.
Today, I no longer hate her or hold the past against her. Why? Because if I did, it would affect my present and my future. I just won't give her that much power in my mind, it's senseless to remain imprisoned by it. Letting go of all that ugliness is the best choice I ever made in life.