I’m DONE with him, so why can’t I kick him out?

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

Flying monkeys are on a spectrum. The worst have an incredibly poor sense of self and blow with the wind, believe what they are told especially if it is in one simple sentence said with apparent confidence. Flying monkeys are also regularly targeted with updates. There are certain flying monkeys in my large extended dysfunctional family, who were targeted by my sister with Narcissistic Personality Disorder and other members of the gang who scapegoat different members of the family from several generations as they like to feel superior to others. For years, I did not understand why people I had no regular contact with, abused me when they saw me. I realized that the smear campaign of my persona started years before I was aware of it, and I experienced certain members of the family scapegoated from birth. I now correct the flying monkeys when they put down me or another family member when it is worth it, with one simple sentence: That is not true.

[zachira]

Flying monkeys are on a spectrum. The worst have an incredibly poor sense of self and blow with the wind, believe what they are told especially if it is in one simple sentence said with apparent confidence. Flying monkeys are also regularly targeted with updates. There are certain flying monkeys in my large extended dysfunctional family, who were targeted by my sister with Narcissistic Personality Disorder and other members of the gang who scapegoat different members of the family from several generations as they like to feel superior to others. For years, I did not understand why people I had no regular contact with, abused me when they saw me. I realized that the smear campaign of my persona started years before I was aware of it, and I experienced certain members of the family scapegoated from birth. I now correct the flying monkeys when they put down me or another family member when it is worth it, with one simple sentence: That is not true.

[zachira]

certain people who my sister and others targeted from birth

[Notwendy]

Have you wondered why you get targeted by the pwBPD or NPD? When I went through the recent "friend considers me guilty of something she thinks I did according to the story of the pwBPD" someone mentioned to me - this seems to happen to you. At first, I felt offended but then wondered- is this true and if so, why is this? 

I think it's that we don't act out. We tend to be the fixers, the ones to try to keep the peace rather than retaliate. It's low risk for them.

[zachira]

There are many reasons why a person can become the target of another person with NPD or BPD. Many of the scapegoats in my large extended dysfunctional  family were chosen from birth. The reasons each one was chosen range from being unattractive, not being brilliant, not being a person who outshines most people, being an unwanted child, jealousy about the child making a great aunt be the only sibling with no grandchildren, etc. I find that I become more of a target of the flying monkeys in my family when I resist being part of the narcissistic family cult. For example, there is no way, I could go along with a child being scapegoated since the day he was born, his great aunt getting others to participate in saying he was unlovable and defective.