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Author Topic: How to get my spouse help if he doesn't believe he has a problem  (Read 346 times)
Smiley22
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 1


« on: February 15, 2017, 11:40:32 PM »

We've been married for 20 years now. yes we've had our ups and downs but recently we've had lots of changes in our lives, alot of turmoil. now my husband is showing signs of mental issues and if I bring up the subject he gets angry and says that I just think he's crazy and refused to talk about it or admit there's a problem. I tried reasoning begging and pleading for him to go see Dr and he refuses. Our situation is just getting worse. He's convinced I'm cheating and even see people getting in my van when I leave the house. That I'm sneaking people in my window and other things that just aren't true. He even thinks our teenage children are apart of it. He thinks people are following him or trying to kill him. I feel so helpless and I want to fix things and help him but I don't know how. I try to convince him but he said he see these things. How do I convince him. How do I make him understand that it's not me but that he's got a condition and needs help. He's talking about divorce and leaving and that's the last thing I want. I love him so much and I see how much this is hurting him. I never want to cause him pain. I don't want him believing these terrible things about me. I want my husband back. What can I say or do to help him.
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ArleighBurke
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: was married - 15 yrs
Posts: 911


« Reply #1 on: February 15, 2017, 11:56:41 PM »

I'm sorry you are going through this... .

I think you really have to approach with love. Make a dr appointment and go with him. Or make a marriage counselling appointment together. Tell him you don't want divorce - that you love him - that you want to work things out together.

Have you read much on this site about BPD? You are here - so I presume you suspect BPD. If you are new - read about Validation. (it's in the tools on the right had side of the window). Validation can help you talk to him on an emotional level (by ignoring his words, and focussing on his feelings). It may help too... .
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