Advice on collecting evidence of DWI incident

[ParentingThruIt]

You could look for police blotters etc to find any evidence of the auto accident (if there was some kind of collision).

You could also call CPS and tell ask them in a theoretical sort of way. When my ex and I were still together, he had started to pass out while caring for the kids. I called CPS about it. Their reply was that they expected me to basically intervene and manage the situation to keep the kids safe, since I was the safe parent in the household, or I could seek to get the other parent removed. It was clear to me that the situation wasn't something I could manage so I got him removed.

[PeteWitsend]

You could look for police blotters etc to find any evidence of the auto accident (if there was some kind of collision).

You could also call CPS and tell ask them in a theoretical sort of way. When my ex and I were still together, he had started to pass out while caring for the kids. I called CPS about it. Their reply was that they expected me to basically intervene and manage the situation to keep the kids safe, since I was the safe parent in the household, or I could seek to get the other parent removed. It was clear to me that the situation wasn't something I could manage so I got him removed.

I checked the local PD, and they don't have a police blotter on their site, or at least one that's public.  And this being a rural area, there's no newspaper or reporting going on.  I did find a website that tracks official accident reports and didn't see anything in the area that matched the description of her vehicle or the incident on that date, or the next day, if they reported it late.

I've paid a PI to see what they can dig up about this, if anything, and any other calls to her address over the years. 

It appears to come down to whether the homeowner who's mailbox was hit would call the police and at least file a report so there's something in the system, or just replace it. 

As far as getting CPS involved, I know they've been called a couple other times on her home due to excessive noisy fighting and arguments.  They didn't do anything and closed the file each time.  In this case, I could see it going nowhere again, as there's no evidence she was drinking (other than my daughter's testimony), and even if they buy it, I could see them concluding it was an isolated incident (it was her wedding day) and wouldn't happen again.  Everytime I've had contact with school counselors, CPS, etc. it seems like they're looking for an excuse to do nothing. 

[ForeverDad]

One time my ex came to my home with an officer for a failed exchange.  Later when I tried to get the officer's record of the visit it was a simple page for the shift with columns including address and simple resolved or not resolved columns.  There was no detail about the interchanges or issues.  In that instance the records were unhelpful.

[PeteWitsend]

One time my ex came to my home with an officer for a failed exchange.  Later when I tried to get the officer's record of the visit it was a simple page for the shift with columns including address and simple resolved or not resolved columns.  There was no detail about the interchanges or issues.  In that instance the records were unhelpful.

Yeah, I'm not expecting much, but I figured if there was a police report made that day regarding the accident, it could substantiate my claim and my daughter's claim of the incident.

a simple "Homeowner reports unknown vehicle hit their mailbox and drove away" would be something at least.  And any other details, such as "white SUV" would go a long way to confirming it, as well as subpoenaing any repairs or insurance claims she's had to make during that time

[PeteWitsend]

Well, the situation there at BPDxw's home has taken a very serious turn for the worst, and so it looks like things are about to get much more complicated for a while.  I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel yet, but it must be there somewhere.  wish me luck.  Got a long way to go right now.  Will share more when able.

[At Bay]

I'm sorry to hear that.

[ForeverDad]

If you think a volcanic eruption is simmering over in ex's home, have your lawyer be alert if/when to file emergency paperwork to remove your daughter from the impending disaster, whatever it is.  Though since courts are usually slow, if emergency services action is needed, then the paperwork comes a close second.

[kells76]

Really sorry things have taken a turn for the worse. Believe me, I get it.

Re: CPS:
It may be less of a question of "they won't do anything" and more a question of "even though they might not do anything, I may have a responsibility to report, regardless of the outcome". Does that make sense? Ask your L.

[PeteWitsend]

Really sorry things have taken a turn for the worse. Believe me, I get it.

Re: CPS:
It may be less of a question of "they won't do anything" and more a question of "even though they might not do anything, I may have a responsibility to report, regardless of the outcome". Does that make sense? Ask your L.

I did file a report.  CPS came out guns blazing, but then (somewhat predictably) went quiet.  But they are involved, FWIW (it is apparently not worth much). 

Aside from that, I won my first legal hurdle; the court is taking things more seriously & gave me everything I asked for temporarily, putting BPDxw behind the 8 Ball.  More hearings coming up if we can't settle, but I'm in the driver's seat, which is good. 

[ForeverDad]

One pattern I've seen over the years and particularly in my own family court hurdles is that courts are very passively reluctant to make major changes to custody and parenting time schedules.  Same goes for the associated professionals.

It's almost as though the court expects major fixes to be too shocking to the children, so they take a "least intervention that addresses the current situation" approach.  I recall my lawyer saying something like that and I remember thinking - or saying - "What if the child wants and needs big changes?"  My parenting in my divorce was like the markets, huge crash at the beginning and then stair stepping back up over time.

You may need to get the services of a trusted Guardian ad Litem (GAL) to represent the legal interests of the children.  I recall William Eddy observing that experienced lawyers don't make much money in such assignments and too often newbies find themselves overextended.  But beware, even there the GAL may go along with the court's passive pace and minimalist approach.  My son's GAL was great but it took a few years and a couple order improvements to attain an order that worked.