Hi again Always27 Wow! I can see how your daughter would have a lot of emotions to sort through.
We did plan ahead types of things in therapy knowing this would be a trigger for her own adoption issues. Our new little one shares a race with our daughter and she is soo happy to see herself in this baby but all the same, tough stuff as she had a front row seat to a birth mom releasing and our son and wife receiving.
Sometime, we can learn about situations/problems when we observe what someone does, as opposed to what someone says. Although you say your daughter seemed soo happy about the adoption of your grandchild, her sexting activity tends to indicate that it flared up her fear of abandonment and/or loss.
she had a front row seat to a birth mom releasing and our son and wife receiving. They are from out of state so have been staying in our home part time and that also adds crazy to the mix as we have 6 other grands age 7 and under. All that to say, yes... .lots of triggers.
I can see that you are a very compassionate person. Since your daughter has some very complex emotional issues, it might be possible that you will have to pull back on some of that compassion with others. In view of the fact that your daughter has not tamed her behavior, erring on the side of preventing situations that might fuel your daughters feelings/fears of abandonment or loss is probably the best strategy.
Did you daughter have to give up her room or have someone else share her room, while the birth parents of your new adopted grandchild stay at your house? Minimally, she has to be getting less attention.
How many people live in your household?