meeting my ex for dinner

[kc sunshine]

Hi all,

I was on here a while back trying to save my relationship with my ex. Unfortunately I couldn't save it as a romantic relationship but I'm hoping to preserve the relationship as a friendship. I moved away so I'm not in the same town but she's done a good job of staying in touch intermittently over the past 7 months. She has a new girlfriend who she's lived with for the past 7 months as well. I'm visiting town this week and we made a plan to see each other. I was hoping it would be coffee with just her but she wants all of us (me, her, her daughter, and her new girlfriend) to have dinner. I said okay to that but I'm a bit worried it might very hard for me to see her new configuration. Do you all have any hints of ways that I could navigate/negotiate this situation so as to achieve the goal of building a friendship? The phrase that comes to mind for me is "put on my big girl pants!"

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Meili]

Oh, man, that's a tough one. I dread the thought of finally seeing my ex and whoever who guy at the time is. I can't even begin to imagine sitting for coffee in that situation. You're braver than I am.

The only real suggestion that I have is to just allow yourself to experience the emotions. Remember that they are natural, real, and valid. Don't try to fight them. But, of course, you don't have to act on any of them either. Just recognize that they exist.

What do you think might happen?

[Working Out]

Wow. Yeah I couldn't do it. Just the thought of seeing my ex and a new guy hurts.