What is JADE?

[Tessi]

I'm trying to learn how to better communicate w my BPD bf. I've read about SET but don't know about JADEing. When he is angry with me, I try to reason and defend myself. Obviously, at by that point he is beyond being emotionally reasonable... .Are there helpful skills that I should be using?

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[JoeBPD81]

Hello there

I'm at work and I can't write a lot, but here you have a good post 
https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=139972.0

[Tessi]

Very helpful. Thank you.

[JoeBPD81]

 
My boss caught me and told me to stop "doing my things" and work, I had pressed Post without noticing.

[Meili]

Here are two other very useful links for you Tessi:

Communicate - Listen and Be Heard
and
Validation Skill - Stop Invalidating Others

There are several different communication skills that can be very helpful. One of the easiest and best things that we can all learn to do is to stop being invalidating. It can go a long way to help defuse a situation before it escalates and then you have a better chance at using the other communication skills.