Glad to find this group

[SisterRichard]

I am the daughter of a BPD mother, and though she is now deceased, the effects of my upbringing continue to resonate and impact my life and relationships today.

I just finished reading "Surviving a Borderline Parent," which listed this forum in the resource section. It is a profound relief to realize I'm not the only one on the planet who experienced the effects of this puzzling disorder.

I hope to gain insight that will help me reclaim/repair parts of myself that I continue to struggle with.

Sister Richard was my mother's name in the convent; she was a nun prior to being married, so there's an extra layer of judgment/guilt/rigid thinking on top of the BPD in her case. A potent mix.

Thanks for providing this outlet.

[Kwamina]

Hi and welcome to our online community

You are indeed not the only one who has had this difficult experience of being raised by a BPD parent. It is tough, but I hope participating here will help you in your healing process.

... .the effects of my upbringing continue to resonate and impact my life and relationships today.

This is true for a lot of our members who were raised by a BPD parent. Dealing with a BPD parent can really affect children. In what ways do you feel your adult life and relationships are still impacted by your upbringing by your BPD mother?

I hope to gain insight that will help me reclaim/repair parts of myself that I continue to struggle with.

What are the things you currently find yourself struggling with most?

Take care

The Board Parrot

[SisterRichard]

Thanks for the welcome, Board Parrot.

Current struggles: summoning the self esteem required to successfully promote my work. In my family of origin, calling attention to yourself was not okay. I learned to be invisible, to fly under the radar, to keep the peace. Not participating in the BPD's ongoing drama and chaos became a way of coping, to the point that now I am uncomfortable with many forms of attention, even positive. I've just written a novel and have done very little to promote it, or even tell others I've done so. I should be basking in glory but am instead minimizing or hiding altogether. Avoiding the spotlight.

[Kwamina]

I should be basking in glory but am instead minimizing or hiding altogether. Avoiding the spotlight.

Well perhaps we can put the bpdfamily spotlight on you then!

Congratulations on writing that novel, that's a wonderful accomplishment (I hope you don't mind the attention  )

When you read the posts on these boards, I think you will see that many of our members have struggled and often still struggle with self-esteem issues. Can you perhaps pinpoint the exact thoughts that go through your mind when you feel like hiding and minimizing instead of basking in the glory? What is your internal dialogue when that happens, what do you tell yourself?

[DaughterOfHera]

  Welcome.  I too have a BPD mother and was just posting this morning about the repercussions of growing up in a similar situation to yours.  I have found this site to be wonderful... .it's here 24 / 7 and is a good place to share, to ask questions, to sort out thoughts / feelings and so on.  I've bookmarked the web address and keep my screen name and password handy for the days I need to check in and be among others who understand. *wink* I send you wishes for further insight and healing as you continue your journey --- you deserve them.