Relatively few males have BPD, but it seems as if about half of these posts are from women

[aristan2000]

Just an observation: relatively few males have BPD, but it seems as if about half of these posts are from women talking about their BPD ex-boyfriends. I'm guessing that this is either a very odd statistical anomaly or some of these women are misidentifying BPD for NPD or cluster B personality traits.

[MeandThee29]

My husband does have a BPD diagnosis from a clinical psychologist, for what it's worth.

From emails and calls, I would surmise that he spends at least some of his time thinking about all the ways that I failed to meet his needs when we were together, and how I'm failing him long-distance in separation. Which is really pretty sad. He's stewing about the past with someone he's no longer close to. Even if we were truly on the road to reconciliation (which isn't going to happen any time soon), focusing on your partner's faults in the past is a non-productive activity unless it drives you to change yourself.

I do think of him fondly. When we had our 25th awhile back, I chose to focus on the happy memories and our two young adults who wouldn't be here without him. It's all a matter of perspective.

But the present? No way can we be together.

[steelwork]

FYI, it's now thought that the incidence of BPD is fairly evenly split between men and women. See for instance:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3115767/

My impression is that the different between the sexes in rate of diagnosis (which is narrowing) has to do with gender stereotypes, and with the different ways men and women express things like impulsivity and abandonment fears.

Just an observation: relatively few males have BPD, but it seems as if about half of these posts are from women talking about their BPD ex-boyfriends. I'm guessing that this is either a very odd statistical anomaly or some of these women are misidentifying BPD for NPD or cluster B personality traits.

[Skip]

BPD incidence data:

~ the prevalence of the disorder is  5.9%

~ that prevalence in men is the same as women.

~ BPD was more prevalent among Native American men, younger and separated/divorced/windowed adults, and lower income and education.

~ BPD was less prevalent among Hispanic men and women, and Asian women.

~ the study details many other conclusions such as BPD prevalence was greatest among people with bipolar disorder (50%), panic disorder, or drug dependence.  Smokers were also more likely to have BPD.

~ 24% had comorbidity with another personality disorder.  The rates of NPD/BPD and ASPD/BPD were higher among women.

~ the greatest decline was seen after 44 years old.

Lots more info here:
https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=66448.msg784927#msg784927

[Icefog]

I also believe it's been under diagnosed in men primarily because in psychological circles it was more of a woman's personality disorder. Men I've seen that have been diagnosed with NPD and even some with APD had a high degree of borderline traits and features

[snowglobe]

Unlike clinical study, merely an observation can’t provide cause and effect relationship. In this case it’s an extraneous variable, females have societal rules enforced in them, thus making them more forthcoming when seeking help and social support. The difference is attributed to the gender difference in the approach of problem solving.