Help for young BPD brother

[Depression = 72% of members]

Hi, my 19 year old brother was diagnosed with BPD earlier this year (he does not acknowledge this diagnosis). For years he's been making my parents' lives a living hell (constant stealing, fighting, drug use, car crashes), but recently it's really been escalating. There have been online searches for how to kill himself with minimum pain and he tried to break into my dad's gun safe (to no avail since that thing is locked down tight). At this point I don't know what to do. He'll refuse any sort of inpatient treatment saying that "there's nothing they can do."

He's been 51/50ed twice; once a few years ago and then again this July. The doctor at the hospital he was sent to is the one he gave him the diagnosis, but then sent him home three days later despite our hesitations with little more than a low dosage of Prozac and my brother feeling as though he had been wronged and my parents were to blame (despite the fact that he had been the one to go to the hospital and ask for drugs because he felt suicidal).

Does anyone have any advice? I'm honestly scared about how much time he has left. I know he's been taking street Xanax, and now he's officially ruined multiple relationships in his life. And, on a selfish note, I don't know how long we as a family can deal with this. Our lives are completely in his control.

He wants to go away to college this next semester, but we all fear that that will just be the last straw as he will have no support system. Of course when this is brought up to him, he only responds indignantly and with anger.

Does anybody have any suggestions for convincing him to get help?

[charlieblack]

Hi, my 19 year old brother was diagnosed with BPD earlier this year (he does not acknowledge this diagnosis). For years he's been making my parents' lives a living hell (constant stealing, fighting, drug use, car crashes), but recently it's really been escalating. There have been online searches for how to kill himself with minimum pain and he tried to break into my dad's gun safe (to no avail since that thing is locked down tight). At this point I don't know what to do. He'll refuse any sort of inpatient treatment saying that "there's nothing they can do."

He's been 51/50ed twice; once a few years ago and then again this July. The doctor at the hospital he was sent to is the one he gave him the diagnosis, but then sent him home three days later despite our hesitations with little more than a low dosage of Prozac and my brother feeling as though he had been wronged and my parents were to blame (despite the fact that he had been the one to go to the hospital and ask for drugs because he felt suicidal).

Does anyone have any advice? I'm honestly scared about how much time he has left. I know he's been taking street Xanax, and now he's officially ruined multiple relationships in his life. And, on a selfish note, I don't know how long we as a family can deal with this. Our lives are completely in his control.

He wants to go away to college this next semester, but we all fear that that will just be the last straw as he will have no support system. Of course when this is brought up to him, he only responds indignantly and with anger.

Does anybody have any suggestions for convincing him to get help?

[Woolspinner2000]

Hi Charlieblack! 

Welcome to our online family. I'm glad you've found us and thank you for sharing your post.

It is so tough to have someone with BPD in your life. It's a continual struggle to maneuver the ups and downs, constant and never-ending as they are. Through all of this with your brother, do any of you have a T to help you? I can tell you that a good T who is familiar with BPD is worth their weight in gold.

Have you read any books about BPD? They are also helpful. Learning about BPD can help you to come towards the challenges with the information you need to stay healthy in spite of what they do. It's super important that you have good self care too, so that you don't get worn down. Find things that build you up to recharge you. What does that look like for you?

Here is a specific link about treatment:
Anosognosia and Getting a "Borderline" into Therapy

Stay in touch and let us know how you are doing!

 
Wools