jumping through hoops for therapy

[valleymom]

I hope it is ok for me to vent a little frustration here.  My daughter has been trying to get therapy that she could afford since her BPD diagnosis.  She was told by the psychiatrist that they "diagnose, they don't treat." The referral was made in hopes that it would be covered by OHIP. She was then referred to a location that charged on a sliding scale.  After a phone interview she was told she would be contacted "within the week." When after a few weeks no one called she called them to be told that it was not 1 week it was 10-12.  Knowing that the person on the phone is mentally ill should they not be much more careful to give accurate information! The real frustration is that the was to get her a therapist so that she could possibly qualify for a DBT program.

She feels like she jumps through the hoops and then they add more hoops.

ugh! 

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Mutt]

Hi valleymom



You can vent here this platform is a place  Where you won’t get invalidated or judged for your thoughts and feelings. I’m sorry to hear about the mix-up that has to be frustrating when you want to get into therapy hopefully this the last hoop because next is therapy good luck to you and your D  

[MomMae]

Hi valleymom,

When I read OHIP in your post, I knew why your story is the same as mine.  I am from Ontario, too, and the exact same thing happened to my daughter.  The DBT offered through our local hospital is what they call "self-referral".  The mentally ill person has to do all the arranging, not even their social worker can do it.  My daughter self-referred and waited and waited and waited.  Twice when she looked into it, she was no longer on the list, had to be put on again.  It was only when they knew that I was involved and getting vocal about it, that she finally got into the DBT.  It took almost two years.

I am so sorry that your daughter is made to feel that she has to jump through hoops.  My daughter felt the exact same way and felt like nobody gave a damn.  We were told time and again that she had to ask for help herself, we couldn't ask for her.  The thing is, she was asking, repeatedly actually, and she was ignored.  And she was powerless to complain, because, hey, she's mentally ill and confused, right?  It makes me sad and angry to think of the number of people who must fall through the cracks because they do not have an advocate.  To even expect a mentally ill person to ask for help once is a lot, to expect them to ask repeatedly is cruel and seems like a way to just make them go away.