BPD feelings after a relationship/Is it love or is it hate?

[VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?"]

One subject I wanted to throw around was the feelings of BPD person after final break up. My ex went from triangulation to punishment, to splitting me black to stalking accusations, to having the new partner harass me. So I think I experienced the ultimate BPD cruelty ha!. I do tend to wonder what is going through their mind during this, also when you are out of the picture, and they are with a new partner,  makes them think of us? I have heard people say " Out of sight, out of mind". But I don't think I believe that. I saw her on the street as she was getting out of work one day, maybe a month after we last saw each other, and she clearly saw me, and recognized me. I just kept going of course. I have heard from friends that are still on her Facebook that her posts go from being in love to posts about break ups and men leaving her, referring to one specifically which I can only assume is me. I was only informed of the posts due to the stalking allegations, I wanted to make sure they did not go further than just nonsense on Facebook and make sure I was not specifically named. Also on the night the new partner contacted me it was New Year's Eve, and they were out partying, how would I, the ex, even be brought up in the conversation? They had posted a bunch of pics from that night showing how much fun they had, but somehow they thought of harassing me on Facebook during that? I just can't wrap my around what goes through the mind of a BPD person. Maybe their emotions are going from one extreme to the other? One minute they are in love with the new partner and the next they think of us and hate us for leaving them? My ex was determined to push me out of the picture any way she could, in the most cruel way, told me right out how happy she was and how in love she was. How would I still be on her mind after all that? I read once your split black that's it. Anyone have any thoughts on this/ Or similar experiences?

[Maxpax2011]

One subject I wanted to throw around was the feelings of BPD person after final break up. My ex went from triangulation to punishment, to splitting me black to stalking accusations, to having the new partner harass me. So I think I experienced the ultimate BPD cruelty ha!. I do tend to wonder what is going through their mind during this, also when you are out of the picture, and they are with a new partner,  makes them think of us? I have heard people say " Out of sight, out of mind". But I don't think I believe that. I saw her on the street as she was getting out of work one day, maybe a month after we last saw each other, and she clearly saw me, and recognized me. I just kept going of course. I have heard from friends that are still on her Facebook that her posts go from being in love to posts about break ups and men leaving her, referring to one specifically which I can only assume is me. I was only informed of the posts due to the stalking allegations, I wanted to make sure they did not go further than just nonsense on Facebook and make sure I was not specifically named. Also on the night the new partner contacted me it was New Year's Eve, and they were out partying, how would I, the ex, even be brought up in the conversation? They had posted a bunch of pics from that night showing how much fun they had, but somehow they thought of harassing me on Facebook during that? I just can't wrap my around what goes through the mind of a BPD person. Maybe their emotions are going from one extreme to the other? One minute they are in love with the new partner and the next they think of us and hate us for leaving them? My ex was determined to push me out of the picture any way she could, in the most cruel way, told me right out how happy she was and how in love she was. How would I still be on her mind after all that? I read once your split black that's it. Anyone have any thoughts on this/ Or similar experiences?

[In a bad way]

I was going to start a similar topic to this, I was wondering the other day if they ever realise or think about what they lost regarding splitting up with us?
I was good to mine (understatement) as I'm sure we all were, I did so much for her and her kids.
All sorts of things from cooking and cleaning to making doctors appointments for her and them, making sure they got to school, taking the oldest one to job interviews.
Way to much to list here, but what I mean is when I was gone and she had to do all these things herself would she have realised just how much I really did for her in everyday things?
Would she have had regrets or are they not capable of such thoughts?

[Maxpax2011]

I was going to start a similar topic to this, I was wondering the other day if they ever realise or think about what they lost regarding splitting up with us?
I was good to mine (understatement) as I'm sure we all were, I did so much for her and her kids.
All sorts of things from cooking and cleaning to making doctors appointments for her and them, making sure they got to school, taking the oldest one to job interviews.
Way to much to list here, but what I mean is when I was gone and she had to do all these things herself would she have realised just how much I really did for her in everyday things?
Would she have had regrets or are they not capable of such thoughts?

I wonder that as well, as I was good to my ex and her daughter, I did the many things you did, I also helped her get the current job she has, making more money. I think maybe they do, but they are so caught up in the victim role and projection maybe they can't face it, which is why we are split back? The fact that she still thinks about me, whether it is positive or negative does make me wonder though. I know the guy she has now, is nothing like me as far as character or responsibilities. I have heard a lot of negative things about him from people in town, and from what I can tell by his behavior towards me, I would classify him as a low life. But she seemed to be completely swept off her feet by him, so I have no idea ha! I do know that when I was dating her, she seemed to look back on her exes from time to time, she had a couple of them on her Facebook. I do know that when she saw one remarry and have kids it seemed to affect her, and her daughters Father was recently engaged and bough a new house, I noticed that also affected her. So maybe they regret the loss, but we will never know I don't think as these people bury their true emotions very deep. How long were you with yours? Did you ever see the kids after you broke up? Any contact with her since? She move on?

[In a bad way]

          . How long were you with yours? Did you ever see the kids after you broke up? Any contact with her since? She move on?         

I was with her for a year, it was both the best and worse year of my life, so many things happened it's hard to believe it was only a year.
I've never seen her kids exactly, what I mean is (something else I was going to post) I saw one of them not long ago when I was outside my friends house. I was just finishing a cigarette and my ex's child walked past, it was a a freaky thing to say the least.
I turned away because I didn't want to risk speaking to her in case it gave reason for my ex to call me to people, she has probably called me for not speaking.
I was in shock and panicked really, I didn't know what to do.
The child didn't speak to me, also I don't think she would if I had spoken to her, she was a bit of a problem child who just took my help and kindness for granted, partly because her dad had brainwashed them all against me.
I know I should have said hello but didn't want to risk it.
I have had no contact with my ex, I sent her a letter once, no reply, I sent her a message months ago, that just resulted in her publicly slagging me off to people.
I have no idea if she moved on to a new person, I would expect so and she is probably not on her first one, I discovered she quickly got into new relationships after breakups before I met her.

[Maxpax2011]

I was with her for a year, it was both the best and worse year of my life, so many things happened it's hard to believe it was only a year.
I've never seen her kids exactly, what I mean is (something else I was going to post) I saw one of them not long ago when I was outside my friends house. I was just finishing a cigarette and my ex's child walked past, it was a a freaky thing to say the least.
I turned away because I didn't want to risk speaking to her in case it gave reason for my ex to call me to people, she has probably called me for not speaking.
I was in shock and panicked really, I didn't know what to do.
The child didn't speak to me, also I don't think she would if I had spoken to her, she was a bit of a problem child who just took my help and kindness for granted, partly because her dad had brainwashed them all against me.
I know I should have said hello but didn't want to risk it.
I have had no contact with my ex, I sent her a letter once, no reply, I sent her a message months ago, that just resulted in her publicly slagging me off to people.
I have no idea if she moved on to a new person, I would expect so and she is probably not on her first one, I discovered she quickly got into new relationships after breakups before I met her.

I was with mine for two years, been 6 weeks since last contact. How was the break up? And her behavior following?

[In a bad way]

I was with mine for two years, been 6 weeks since last contact. How was the break up? And her behavior following?

The breakup was messy, so much had happened over the previous few weeks, her rages, starting arguments and her breaking promises to me. A massive part of it was her ex husband always on the scene interfering with us, that would take me a week to write down, but the jist of it was he was jealous and through the kids got to her her about how upset and hurt he was because she was with me. Anything I suggested we do she would say but he will find out and get upset so we can't do that.
It was pathetic.
I lost it the last time I saw her and kicked a vase over on the way out, not proud of it and I regret it but I tell myself I am only human and can only take so much. I would not allow a friend or stranger to get away with 1% of what she did without me losing it.
I am not a violent man, she obviously used that against me , said I was an angry scary man.
We stayed in touch via text for a few weeks and then nothing, not a word from her.
That is the part that will always get me, the complete cut off out of her life after all the promises and we were engaged with plans. I just sold my house in Italy for us to use to get married.
All the cr*p I put up with from her, yet she abandoned me... .After making me promise I would never abandon her.