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How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
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Author Topic: I broke NC, but for my peace of mind  (Read 503 times)
insideoutside
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Friend
Posts: 330



« on: March 05, 2018, 06:33:33 AM »

Hi guys

So it’s been a little over a month since I last spoke to my friend.  I did say a horrible thing to him as I was so angry and hurt by a text he sent.  I knew I’d regret saying it and so did he.  Anyway, I’ve sat on it for a month to make sure that my anger had subsided.  I emailed him today to apologise for what I said and that he was correct, it wasn’t in my nature to say what I did.  I said I was not expecting anything from him and that I hope he would be able to forgive me as I was truly sorry.  I finished the email that I hoped he was well.

Whether he gets it or not who knows; whether he forgives my words, who knows.  But I apologised as 1. I hated myself for saying what I did and 2. I needed peace of mind.

I don’t envisage any contact from him.  We just don’t work.  We can’t get along as friends and adding anything extra to the mix was a recipe for disaster.

Time to let go now and move on.
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Lucky Jim
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 6211


« Reply #1 on: March 05, 2018, 12:31:20 PM »

Hey inside outside,  Because you have let go of the outcome, your email makes sense to me.  It's about sending a message of apology that you deem important, rather than expecting any particular response, if any, from him.  Right, now it's time to move forward and to decline to waste any more time or energy thinking about whatever you said to him that, in retrospect, you regretted.

LJ
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    A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.
George Bernard Shaw
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